On a Quiet Street by Carla Kovach

Author:Carla Kovach [Kovach, Carla]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2024-01-15T00:00:00+00:00

THIRTY-FOUR

It’s my fifth night and we’re into December. I wanted to put a little Christmas tree up in Jean’s room but she refused to let me get one. She said Christmas is a commercial waste of money and she doesn’t condone it. I have to respect her wishes. It’s also the first night I have come without Charlotte and I can’t explain how alone I feel. Yesterday Charlotte brought some chocolate and we all watched a film together. It seemed strange that Jean had chosen The Wizard of Oz but we went with it. After that, we played cards which was quite fun. I’ve never played Rummy before. Jean is a shark when it comes to cards. I definitely wouldn’t play her for money.

I watch as Jean’s chest rises and falls, not smoothly but as if she’s struggling. Now and again, she stops breathing but then gasps a little and other times, she lets out a little whistle as she exhales. A clump of yellow sleep has gathered at the corners of her eyes, and I resist the urge to reach out and clean it. The red pillow she normally rests her arm on has been cast aside. She still hasn’t told me much about her cancer, but I’m guessing it’s spread to her lungs as the cracking in her chest makes me wince.

‘Jean,’ I whisper, hoping that she’ll respond.

‘Huh?’ She lets out a cry as she opens her eyes. ‘You’re still here and I’m still alive.’

I know more about her wishes now. She has refused hospital in any circumstance and has insisted that she come home to die. The nurses are privately hired, and Nurse Kayla has gone home now. The nurse explained what palliative care meant and that Jean was on morphine for the pain. I’ve learned so much these past few days but I haven’t learned a single thing about my birth mother.

‘Can we talk about my mother?’

Jean coughs so I pass her the box of tissues. I can’t look as she spits into one so I turn away. As I turn back, I can see that she’s deposited the tissue on her chest and is lying back down. ‘She was nothing like you. She…’ Jean pauses in thought.

Really? I can’t believe that the woman who supposedly gave birth to me was nothing at all like me. Jean doesn’t like me saying much and she snaps if I interrupt her. When I butted in, it wasn’t intentional, I just wanted to know where I came from and I don’t know why we’re playing this game. I’m not her carer and she’s not my client, but I’m forced to be here if I want to understand who I am. I’d welcome a job in a shop now.

Jean witters on and I listen as she tells me so much.

‘Yes, your mother grew up in this house. My husband, your grandfather, died when she was little so she doesn’t really remember him. It was just me and her. I had such high hopes for her.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.