Jake Drake, Class Clown by Andrew Clements

Author:Andrew Clements
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Atheneum Books for Young Readers

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Seven, eight, nine.

Seven, eight, nine who?

Sven ate nine cookies!

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Robins go.

Robins go who?

No! Robins go tweet; owls go who!

What goes “Ha ha bonk”?

A man who laughs his head off!

If I had five baseballs in one hand, and I had five baseballs in the other, what would I have?

Really BIG hands!

What’s worse than finding a worm in your apple?

Finding half a worm!

It’s not much fun telling jokes to yourself, so I got tired of that pretty fast. But as I looked in the mirror, I remembered how great I am at making funny faces.

So I practiced crossing my eyes and sticking my tongue out. I practiced pushing my nose up and making a pig face. I practiced puffing up my cheeks and pulling my eyelids out of shape. No doubt about it: I was a pretty funny kid.

But after a while my face got tired. And my eyes started to hurt from crossing them so much.

So I looked on my bookshelf until I found this book of jokes I got at a book fair. And I sat on my bed and I read the whole book. Then I lay down on my stomach and read it again. The whole book.

I guess being so funny had made me tired, because I fell asleep with my face in the joke book. And the next thing I knew, Mom was calling to me to come downstairs for dinner.

When I went into the kitchen, my dad smiled at me and said, “Hey, Jake! What’s new?”

And I said, “The moon.”

Dad said, “The moon?”

And I said, “Yup. There’s a new moon every month.”

Dad and Mom laughed, and Dad said, “That’s a good one, Jake.”

Abby said, “It’s not as funny as toodle.”

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