How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big: Kind of the Story of My Life by Adams Scott

Author:Adams, Scott [Adams, Scott]
Language: eng
Format: epub, mobi, azw3, pdf
ISBN: 9780241968703
Publisher: Penguin Books Ltd
Published: 2013-10-21T18:30:00+00:00

If you’re like me, the questions seem a bit too awkward and personal for someone you just met. Prior to experiencing the Dale Carnegie course I would meet someone new and immediately go into joking mode because I didn’t know what else to talk about. I discovered that perhaps only 5 percent of the general population wants to get into joking mode with a stranger. And of that 5 percent, maybe only half of them will appreciate whatever you think is funny. Everyone else will want you to go away. While most people enjoy humor, the typical person doesn’t go directly there before getting to know someone.

The secret to making the list of six questions work without seeming awkward is in understanding that the person you meet will feel every bit as awkward as you. That person wants to talk about something interesting and to sound knowledgeable. Your job is to make that easy. Nothing is easier than talking about one’s self. I would go so far as to say that 99 percent of the general public love talking about themselves. When you ask a stranger a personal question, you make that person happy. Your question relieves the stress of awkward silence and gets the conversation moving. Best of all, it signals that you have interest in the stranger, which most people interpret as friendliness and social confidence, even if you’re faking it. And faking social confidence leads to the real thing over time.

Your job as a conversationalist is to keep asking questions and keep looking for something you have in common with the stranger, or something that interests you enough to wade into the topic. In my entire life I have never met a stranger who didn’t have some fascinating life experiences that spilled out if I asked the right questions. Everyone is interesting if you make the situation feel safe. Here’s a summary of good conversation technique.

Ask questions.

Don’t complain (much).

Don’t talk about boring experiences (TV show, meal, dream, etc.).

Don’t dominate the conversation. Let others talk.

Don’t get stuck on a topic. Keep moving.

Planning is useful but it isn’t conversation.

Keep the sad stories short, especially medical stories.

Download

Copyright Disclaimer:
This site does not store any files on its server. We only index and link to content provided by other sites. Please contact the content providers to delete copyright contents if any and email us, we'll remove relevant links or contents immediately.