Dear Heartbreak by Heather Demetrios

Author:Heather Demetrios
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Henry Holt and Co. (BYR)

I think with some people you can just tell you’re going to have a history with them. Even if that history hasn’t happened yet.

—Here We Are Now, Jasmine Warga

Dear Heartbreak,

I’m dating a boy who is poisonous. In many ways we are similar. We both like the same things, we both play sports, we both have the same sense of honor, we both care about each other. I know he loves me, and I’m not sure if I’m in love with him yet, but I know I love him. When we first started dating, my best friend had feelings for him, which I was unaware of. I’d constantly ask her if she did, and she would never tell me, so I figured I had the go-ahead. I realized after a month of unspoken words and weird unknown distance, I was wrong. We tried to talk about the situation, which for me made it worse. She told me that she loved him, and from here I didn’t know what to do.

He had feelings for me, he picked me, and he made me feel loved. I didn’t want to give up something that made me feel happy and made me feel loved, cared for. I was stuck. I knew if I broke up with him, he’d be devastated and I’d be hurt, and overall, what would that do for my friend? It wouldn’t mean she could date him, but maybe it wouldn’t hurt as much to see that her best friend was no longer with the boy she loved. So what do I do? Do I sacrifice my own, his, happiness so she would not be hurt? That doesn’t seem fair. It doesn’t seem fair that all this time she’d say nothing about her feelings until it was too late. Until she realized what she had lost.

But what about me? I love him. He loves me. I don’t want to lose him. I want him. Like a drug, addictive, yet poisonous. I don’t want to hurt her; however, I am happy and don’t want to hurt myself or him. Either way, someone gets hurt, and it sucks. I don’t think there is a right or wrong answer. It’s simply him or her? Either way, I lose someone I didn’t want to lose. Either way, I sacrifice. Either way, I was put in a situation that is unfair, that is challenging, that is hurtful to someone.

—Undecided Girl

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