Anger Management For Dummies by Laura L. Smith

Author:Laura L. Smith [Smith, Laura L.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781119828297
Publisher: Wiley
Published: 2021-09-06T00:00:00+00:00

By following these suggestions, Aaron got “unstuck,” not from the financial realities of his job but from the negative emotion — anger — that accompanied it. He still had to watch his pennies, but he was no longer a disgruntled man.

The self-centered employee

It’s no surprise that entitled, self-centered employees have a short fuse. Chapter 7 discusses the role of inflated self-esteem and anger. Here, I show you how this problem affects the workplace.

Dr. Lisa Penny at the University of South Florida has studied the relationship between big egos (the technical term for this is narcissism), anger, and counterproductive work behavior. As it turns out, the bigger your ego (that is, the more self-centered you are), the more easily angered you are at work and, in turn, the more likely you are to engage in CWB. Although no one likes to be constrained at work — interrupted by others, inadequately trained, lacking the resources you need to complete the job satisfactorily — self-centered employees take these constraints personally (Why are you doing this to me?) and react with anger.

How do you know if you fall into this category? Here are some clues:

You seem self-absorbed in what you’re doing and unaware of (and unconcerned about) what your colleagues are doing. You aren’t a team player.

You have a clear sense of entitlement. For example, you may say things like, “You owe me respect” and “I have a right to that raise or promotion.”

You can’t put yourself in the other guy’s shoes whenever there’s a conflict of some sort or difference of opinion. You just keep reiterating what you want, how you see things, and why your solution is the right one.

You tend to be grandiose, feeling as though you’re somehow special when it comes to working with others or completing a project. You expect your co-workers to defer to you because of your power, brilliant ideas, and charismatic personality.

You tend to exploit others at work — that is, always use others to meet your agenda regardless of the cost to your fellow employees. And, to add insult to injury, you get angry if your co-workers don’t appreciate the fact that you chose them to exploit!

You self-reference a lot. The words I, me, and mine seem to permeate your speech no matter what the topic.

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