Toilet Training Without Tantrums by John Rosemond

Author:John Rosemond
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781449418502
Publisher: Andrews McMeel Publishing
Published: 2001-09-15T00:00:00+00:00

PREPARING YOU WITH FIVE C-WORDS

Every good teacher prepares for class in advance. Toilet training requires that you teach, and the effectiveness of your teaching will depend in large part on how effectively you plan ahead. Arrange things so that you are able to remain at home as much as possible during the first week of training. Do that week’s grocery shopping, and other errands you can anticipate having to do, beforehand. If you work outside the home, take vacation or personal time. This all but ensures that you will be able to stay focused on the task at hand and provide a consistent learning environment for your child. Do not go into this with the intent of being finished within a week, because you probably won’t be. However, a week of focused but relaxed training should get the project off the ground and to a point where your child is cruising fairly smoothly toward the finish line. Most important, you absolutely must approach toilet training with the understanding that once you get started you are going to see it through until completion. An attitude of “we’ll try this for a while and see if it works out” is almost surely going to doom the project to failure.

In fact, your attitude is the most important variable of all. A proper attitude consists of five Cs: cool, calm, collected, confident, and committed.

COOL means that you approach this as if it’s the most natural thing in the world to be doing at this point in time—no big deal. Keep in mind that toilet training is no bigger a deal than teaching your child to feed himself with a spoon: You demonstrate, give whatever assistance is needed, and clean up the messes the child will make during the learning process. Let’s consider a comparison: You don’t agonize over whether your child is ready to begin learning to use a spoon; you can see with your own eyes that he is capable of holding a spoon and guiding it, however clumsily, to his mouth. You accept that a certain amount of trial and error is going to be involved, and you resolve to be patient. You don’t peruse the library for books on spoon training. At most, you might call your mother and ask her for some practical advice. You don’t buy him a spoon that plays Tchaikovsky’s “1812 Overture” when he manages to get it into his mouth without spilling its contents. You don’t read your child picture books or show him videos of children using spoons. You don’t jump up and down and clap and squeal the first time your child gets the spoon to his mouth successfully. You just say, “Good for you!” and let that be it. You don’t reward him with stars or new toys for feeding himself. You let the mastery of the skill be its own reward. And so it should be with toilet training. Now, say this out loud: “And so it will be!”

CALM

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