Thriving in Relationships When You Have OCD by Amy Mariaskin

Author:Amy Mariaskin
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
Published: 2022-10-26T22:12:14+00:00

Romantic Partnership: Exploring Your Values

Imagine finding a pair of odd sunglasses with neon lines shooting across the frames. As you lift them to your face, you’re transported back to your happiest memory with a romantic partner. It’s as though you’ve traveled back in time to this moment and are inhabiting your body again. What are you doing together? Where are you? What are you feeling in this moment with your loved one? How do they make you feel and how do you hope that you’re making them feel? See if you can sink into this moment for a while and immerse yourself in the sights, sounds, tastes, smells, and physical sensations. Then write down any value words that describe this experience (you may want to refer back to the list of values in chapter 4). You may do this for more than one experience if you like and collect a few value words to use for relationship exposures.

Next you’ll use the same technique that you used in chapter 4: building an exposure hierarchy by identifying the discrepancies between what you would like to do if living by your values in a relationship and what OCD currently allows you to do.

When Jamal examined his romantic values, he found himself transported back to the moment that Jack met his parents and siblings. Seeing the man he loved integrated into his family brought him joy and a sense of wholeness. He felt profoundly connected at this time, both to Jack and to his family, and so he chose “connectedness” as one of his values. He was able to use this as a springboard to come up with relationship exposures that would both challenge OCD and increase his connectedness to Jack. He selected engaging with the adoption process again and resuming their weekly walks, which led them past a busy playground, as initial exposure targets.

Value

Romantic Relationship Exposure

Willingness

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