The Human Origins of Beatrice Porter and Other Essential Ghosts by Soraya Palmer

Author:Soraya Palmer [Palmer, Soraya]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-01-29T00:00:00+00:00

Sasha doesn’t show up again for another week. When I find her, she’s with some girl I don’t even recognize, by a miniature waterfall in the park looking high as fuck.

“Not even the Devil himself could drag me to that hellhole,” Sasha says when I ask her to come back with me to the new place. “I’ll talk to you later, Lex,” she says, and the girl gets up to leave.

“Oh c’mon, we could start our own place,” I try.

“Oh for the love of God, not that ‘let’s start our own country’ bullshit again.”

And we smile.

“So where are you staying anyway?”

She gestures in the direction that the girl just exited. “Her name’s Lex.”

“New white girl?”

“Nah it’s not like that. We’re just friends is all.”

“Sure, Sash.”

“Nah, for real though. Her family’s just very sympathetic to our whole situation—I mean they probably think Mom’s a total whack job, but whatever.”

“Uh-huh. So whatever happened to Mel?”

Sasha looks away, coughs, and goes on like she doesn’t even hear me. “Yeah, see, whitefolks don’t ask questions. They believe in democratic family shit where the kids make the decisions with the parents. They won’t call Mom and Dad if I don’t want them to.”

“They should. They could be charged with kidnapping.”

“Don’t be so dramatic, Zora. I’m eighteen for crissakes. I’m an adult now.”

“Without a job or a future.”

“Oh for the love of God, Zora!”

“Okay, okay, whatever.”

“Anyway, I have a plan. I’m going to stay at Lex’s country house with her and her grandparents for the summer. Then I’ll be at Hampshire. If I get in, that is.”

I want to tell her that I miss her, that I need my big sister, but instead I say, “Mom has cancer.”

Pause, deep breath, and then: “I know. She called me right before she left. She asked me to come to lunch, but I told her I was busy.”

“You didn’t, Sasha.”

“She didn’t want me to come, trust me. She gave me like fifteen minutes’ notice and then said she was going to Trinidad to do a couple tests.”

“Well, she’s in complete denial. I just talked to her on the phone yesterday, and she still hasn’t scheduled the surgery to remove the tumors—there’s more than one now. She can’t really afford much either, though, I guess. Plus, she’s only taking medical advice from Ma.”

“Jesus.”

“She doesn’t know when she’s coming back,” I say. “We might have to live with Dad and his woman forever.”

Of course on TV the main character always survives the big battle just at the moment you think they’re about to fail. Like when Buffy’s Mom dies, and then Buffy dies, and then just when you think the show can’t get any darker, Buffy comes back to life.

Sasha doesn’t say anything. I move closer to her, but she just looks away at the waterfall, picks up a stone to flick on the water and makes it skip. I want to know if Sasha’s still in there. Or does she just look like Sasha with someone else’s thoughts stuck inside?

“She’s doing it.

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