No More Sad Goodbyes by Marilyn Reynolds
Author:Marilyn Reynolds
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Adoption; Abortion; Open adoption;
Publisher: New Wind Publishing
Published: 2017-08-15T00:00:00+00:00
Chapter
14
The luxury of a long, hot, private showerâno one yelling to hurry up, no one casting sideways looks at my naked bellyâIâve missed privacy! I sit on the edge of the tub rubbing cocoa butter across my midsection, thinking about Nikkiâs reaction to my offer of a baby. I expected her to be really happy about it, but all sheâd said was, âWeâre both tired. Letâs talk in the morning.â
In the pink room, the crib is folded flat against the wall. The bare mattress leaning next to it. No teddy bears. No baby monitor. No framed Disney characters looking down on me from the walls. It is quiet here, no sweet snoring sounds or outbursts of motherfucker-cocksucker. I take the heart-shaped stone from the back pocket of my notebook for a bedtime talk with my dad.
âHey, Dad. Iâm at Nikkiâs. I figured out how I can be part of the solution.â
âYouâre awesome. I know youâll . . .â
His voice is getting harder and harder to hear. I hold the stone against my chest, hoping the beat of my heart brings new life.
âDad? . . . Daddy?â
In the morning on the patio, while weâre eating cereal and toast and watching Elvis stalk a sparrow, Nikki tells me sheâs got to call the county home and let them know where I am.
âBy law, I should have called them last night. But I just couldnât bring myself to do it. You were so tired, and there was so much to talk about.â
âBut . . . Iâve been reading about adoptions and . . . canât I just stay here with you and Penny until the baby is born? And then you can have the baby?â
âMaybe weâll work something out further down the road, but for right now . . . I donât want to lose my job over this.â
âBut lots of people who adopt let birthmoms stay with them while theyâre pregnant,â I say.
âItâs not about that. Youâre a minor, someone whoâs been in my program at Hamilton for four years, youâre here illegally and Iâm harboring you. Thatâs definitely grounds for dismissal. And even though Iâm a popular coach with winning teams, there are some people whoâre just waiting for a chance to get rid of me.â
âThatâs ridiculous! Youâre the best coach in the whole league. Whoâd want to get rid of you?â
âWell . . . some of the people from Danniâs church. And some others from that big church just off the freeway . . . You know, they think people like Penny and me are trying to corrupt the youth. Like weâre trying to influence you all to become lesbians.â
âThatâs crazy!â
âI know that, but they donât. Things can get pretty nasty someÂtimes.â
Nikki picks up the cereal bowls and carries them inside. I pick up the butter dish and jar of jam and follow. Watching Nikki put the bowls in the dishwasher, wipe down the counter topâtake care of the everyday things that people everywhere take care of, I donât understand the whole âbad influenceâ idea.
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