It's Grim Up North by Sean Wilkinson

Author:Sean Wilkinson [Wilkinson, Sean]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Zombie Apocalypse
Published: 2017-11-28T05:00:00+00:00

Chapter 18 – The rude awakening

I awoke with a jolt at dawn. As if smelling salts had been placed directly under my nose. I’d experienced this feeling before when I was in middle school.

I was one of the youngest in my class, hence one of the smallest. Never being any good at sports I was somehow elected as house captain. It was purely a popularity vote and had nothing to do with my sporting prowess. This fact didn’t endear me to the teacher who was house leader, and he reminded me at every opportunity that the choice made by my peers in electing me was the wrong one.

The smelling salts incident happened on the final sports day of the last year before going to high school. As I mentioned before, I wasn’t any good at sports so imagine my surprise when I found my name on the rugby team sheet. WTF? After ten minutes of remonstrating to the evil twat of a teacher that not only did I not know the rules of said sport, I was also fucking tiny compared with the rest of the team. The majority of them sported bum fluff beards and protruding Adam’s apples. At the time I had just entered into the realms of puberty and possessed a very unreliable voice and two pubes.

As expected, my rugby experience wasn’t pleasant and within the first three minutes of the game I received the gift of a serious concussion, a broken arm and a nose full of smelling salts. The teacher had won. Wanker.

These memories came flooding back as I lay there in my hammock and felt a phantom ache in the arm I’d broken. Awareness of my surroundings broke through my temporary walk down memory lane. The sun was beginning to rise as I peered over the side of the hammock and down to the forest floor. As soon as I did so, the moaning started. There were three of them. Stinking deedaz. They were dry so they hadn’t traversed the river. They had to be the ones that followed me from the highway. I must have been snoring during the night and they’d zeroed in on me. The moaning soon stopped when I lay back down, but they didn’t move away. I had two choices, stay where I was and hope that they eventually left or get in amongst it and go Chuck Norris on the fuckers. I decided to stay where I was and hoped they left. What can I say. At the time I was obviously a coward. It was evident. It had been six weeks and all I’d done was run and hide. I’d been lucky enough that I’d never had to properly defend myself against one of them and I wasn’t about to start now.

Three hours passed and the burning sensation in my bladder was starting to become a problem. I have my routine, you see, and this wasn’t it. The deedaz were still down there and hadn’t moved an inch.

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