I'm in a United State by Henry Paul

Author:Henry, Paul
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Allen & Unwin
Published: 2020-09-12T00:00:00+00:00

OK, let’s finish this bloody chapter. So, Andrew knew it was unlikely he would be able to catapult me to stardom on his own. He knew his limitations as a talent manager, something he had never done before. He was a print journalist working for the New York Times when he was first exposed to me via the internet. I would need an entourage comprising production company personnel and talent agent personnel as well as a manager.

The first was relatively easy. Andrew had an ‘in’ with a well-established production company in New York. Meeting number one with them went well and they enthusiastically signed me. I had a manager and a production company with some significant show credits behind them. Hard to see any way I wouldn’t be a success. Probably within the week.

Back in LA, we had a meeting with CAA. Creative Artists Agency is one of the most prestigious talent agencies in the world. Their address says it all: 2000 Avenue of the Stars, Los Angeles. During this odyssey I had amazing access to the top decision-makers in entertainment. This meeting was no exception. An agency runner met us for coffee before we entered the building and filled us in on what would likely happen. This was an ‘exploratory meeting’. The agency would not take me on officially until I had my first offer, but if all went well they could be involved in brokering that offer.

The lobby was plush and approximately the size of an airport terminal. With an entourage of just two, I entered the lift. It was a mood lift that apparently read the mood of its travellers, and its walls changed colour accordingly. No one in the lift knew which colours corresponded with which mood so all we could tell was that we were feeling yellowish—I wouldn’t have thought that was a good sign.

I was introduced to the secretary of the personal assistant to the agent I had a meeting with, and I waited in a vestibule adjacent to a large office. Turned out the office was the assistant’s, and I spent about half an hour listening to Andrew talking about almost nothing at all. I had been instructed to say as little as possible. I was, after all, the star! God we laughed … I’m just not sure what we were laughing about. This is perhaps the second reason I was not a success. I had no idea what was going on, ever. But this was early days.

It was time to meet the agent. Will Smith or someone who looked exactly like him was sitting in another office as I was taken with Andrew down a corridor and into a boardroom. I chose to sit at the head of a maybe forty-seater table. Andrew chose a less conspicuous seat but both of us stood out in the otherwise empty room.

So, a huge glass table surrounded by forty ‘state of the art’ chairs and lots of technology. None of it operating at this time. I was playing with the many levers on my chair when the door opened and God marched in.

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