Harbor by the Sea by W. M. Andrews

Author:W. M. Andrews
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Sparrow Ink

Chapter Twelve

Evelyn marched as though her life depended on it. Or as though she were trying to escape her feelings, she thought with irony. That was true. But even if she took up running, even marathon running, which she would never in a million years do, there was no way she could outrun the feelings that were threatening to overwhelm her.

The good news was, her muscles were no longer stiff. They were burning from her exertions, but that actually felt good. She might regret it later but for now it was distracting her from the real issue at hand. Her feelings. The sheer volume of them. They were threatening to overwhelm her. But just maybe if she kept marching toward the lighthouse at the point, she could stay one step ahead of them.

It was wishful thinking but since she didn’t want to break down into a puddle of grief right there in the middle of a popular, frequently travelled hiking trail, there was little she could do except stay ahead of it, even if she knew it would catch up to her eventually.

Life is full of choices. Choose wisely. They had chosen to stop the fertility treatments that weren’t working. They had chosen to apply to be foster parents rather than trying to adopt. Or rather, perhaps in addition — they were still debating that. But, had she rushed that decision? Had her desperation made her choose the faster option? Had she chosen wisely?

Evelyn wasn’t certain why those words kept floating through her mind, but it was a welcome distraction. She needed to choose to return to the moment. But she also needed to deal with her feelings. She needed to accept that feelings in themselves weren’t “bad.”

She had finally caved and stopped to buy something more substantial than a granola bar to eat. She had optimistically thought she could walk all the way to the point and then stop for a meal nearly back to her apartment. But with the way all the restaurants closed for long periods in the afternoon, Evelyn had realized she shouldn’t risk it.

“Bonjour.” This time the greeting was obviously from a local as she stepped into the small café. It smelled heavenly of fresh baked bread and coffee grounds. But they didn’t have a great many selections. Her choices looked like sandwiches or sandwiches, Evelyn thought with a smile. But the sandwiches did look delicious. And the granola bar wasn’t going to suffice. She had been a little overconfident in her ability to walk well over ten miles without proper sustenance.

Evelyn was tempted to sink her teeth into the baguette liberally stuffed with brie and smoked meat as soon as she stepped out of the bakery but she had promised herself to make it all the way to the end before she took another full break so she carried on.

Finally feeling calmer and somewhat restored to equilibrium, Evelyn reached the end of the trail and had a spectacular view to enjoy as she sat to finally eat the delicious lunch.

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