Gravitas: Communicate with Confidence, Influence and Authority by Caroline Goyder

Author:Caroline Goyder
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
ISBN: 9781473501447
Publisher: Ebury Publishing
Published: 2014-03-05T14:00:00+00:00

Are afraid of disagreeing

Rarely stand up for themselves

Don’t push their own views forward

Apologise for things that aren’t their fault.

Placators can be seen as yes-men. They show classic passive-aggressive people-pleasing energy. They tend to say yes to everything irrespective of what they actually think and that makes others feel guilty. That nice person who appears to agree with everyone can be highly damaging to projects. Placators are silent, smiling saboteurs – often because they’re too scared to tell you they disagree. They may say yes to your face but when they leave the room they know full well that they won’t do anything different. Nothing changes, even after months of meetings, when you have placators in the room.

They want to be everyone’s friend, everyone’s favourite colleague. They say things like, ‘Whatever you think’, ‘I want to make you happy’ and ‘I’ll go with everyone else’s decision.’ Placators want to put others first. Their level of self-worth is so low that they think they’re unimportant and that their needs and ideas aren’t worth considering. In their minds everyone is superior to them. You have no idea what they really think and for that reason they have no ethos, no definition and no gravitas. People-pleaser placators lack backbone. They sound and look like pushovers.

In order to find the courage to speak their own minds (key to the authority of gravitas) placators need to:

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