Game of Broken Things by Ese McGowan

Author:Ese McGowan [McGowan, Ese]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2020-08-15T22:00:00+00:00

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A new morning, a new hope. I feel renewed with vigour. I’m expecting the call, about Mia and the baby, although why they would call me is debatable. You never know though. I’m hopeful. Not that it matters. I’ll know one way or the other soon enough.

Did I tell you that I’m a liar? Probably did. It happens, I think, to most kids when they are growing up, when they are born into a lie. My father has lied, oh no, correction because that sounds as though it happened a few times, he lied to me my entire life. Not explaining to me why my mother left when I was born is in itself a lie. And lies come along in many forms don’t they? Holding back information, that to me is the worst lie. That’s the lie my father started with. It’s no surprise that I am dishonest with a background like that yet simultaneously I am vehemently defensive if accused of lying, which I mostly do, possibly thousands of times a day. It becomes an art, a skill. Executing a misconception with near borderline aggression and people lean to believe the words. People generally want to accept something is true rather than not. It’s easier that way. You can cope better if you think the world is honest. If you think what’s around you is real. It’s like when an innocent person discovers that their whole life with their spouse has been a lie because they’ve been sleeping with someone else for the entire marriage. It’s a killer. It consumes you, eats away at you, corrodes your flesh and once you have learned to live with it, once that person has been dissected from your world, you find that actually, they can never completely leave because that ill born fact stays with you and the slightest thing can trigger off that overwhelming tidal wave of feeling that you had when you first found out. All you really do with it, is cover it up somewhere in your soul, in your heart, beneath your smiles, beneath your translucent skin. And the person who did this to you, the person who has no conception of empathy, this person merrily jogs along through their life onto the next victim where it will seem to you that nothing ever bothers them and that they will always get what they want. They are no consequences for the offender. Yeah, life’s a bit like that. Imagine that happening to you on day one, the minute they cut the umbilical-chord. If you can imagine that, then you’ll understand why I am the way I am. Listen, I’m not making an excuse for myself. My family are rich. I was born rich. I’m having a little difficulty getting my hands on the amount of money I need or want but that’s not an insurmountable quest. With a little tweaking of those lives around me, I’ll get what I need. Of course the icing on the cake,

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