Finding Tranquility by Laura Heffernan

Author:Laura Heffernan [Heffernan, Laura]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Empress Books
Published: 0101-01-01T00:00:00+00:00

Chapter 15

Three days later, I pulled up at the front of Ethan’s school before lunch and signed him out for the rest of the day. The receptionist watched me shift from one foot to the other, tapping my fingers on the desk.

“Family emergency?”

That’s what I wrote on the sign-out sheet.

“Yes,” I said.

“Want to talk about it?” Her tone was practiced, a little too sympathetic. I didn’t doubt that if I told her about what was happening, half the teachers in the school would hear about it before lunchtime.

“No.”

Ethan rounded the corner and skidded to a halt. “Mom? What’s wrong? Is it Grandma?”

Aware of the receptionist’s eyes and love of gossip, I put one hand on his back and steered Ethan toward the front door. “Grandma’s fine. We’ll talk after lunch.”

How do you tell your child his father hasn’t really been dead his whole life, just kidding, he chose to vanish into thin air? My bedside manner was pretty good, but I didn’t have any idea what to say in this situation, how to answer his questions.

On the phone, Teddy’s therapist friend had suggested it might be easier for me to tell Ethan on my own before bringing him in. As we sat in the parking lot of a fast-food restaurant, sipping milkshakes, I dearly wished I’d taken him to the psychologist’s office first.

“Honey, there’s something we need to talk about,” I began, setting my milkshake in the drink holder and turning to face him.

“I knew it! Grandma’s sick, isn’t she?” The accusation in his eyes broke my heart. Any attempts to soften the blow might just make things worse.

“No, honey. Grandma’s fine. Honestly, I haven’t spoken to her since I picked you up from her house after my trip. She’s so busy these days.”

“Do you have cancer?”

“No one’s sick, Ethan. That’s actually the thing.” I took a deep breath. “Remember how I told you that your father died on 9/11?”

He nodded, suspicion still etched into every feature. “That’s why I get an afternoon off school and a milkshake? Because my dad’s been dead for a long time? I’m going to miss practice now.”

“No, honey. We’re taking the day off because when I was in Quebec last week, I discovered that your father’s alive. He never got on the plane that day.”

His mouth fell open. I could almost see the wheels turning inside his head as he tried, and failed, to process this information. “What?”

These next few minutes were important. I needed to choose my words carefully. Saying the wrong thing could alienate Ethan, not only from Christa, but from me. Ethan was a few months away from becoming a legal adult, and I didn’t want him to start his adulthood full of distrust and anger.

“He was afraid to fly, so he left the airport. Security was different back then—way different. People without tickets used to be allowed to go to the gate to say good-bye to their families or pick people up. He gave his boarding pass to someone else, and the flight crew never realized he wasn’t the one in his seat.

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