Buzz by Marcus Brotherton

Author:Marcus Brotherton [Brotherton, Marcus]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 978-0-307-56247-0
Publisher: Crown Religion/Business/Forum

Stories that show messed up lives…

KING “I CAN DRINK BOOZE FOR A WEEK” XERXES (from ESTHER 1:1-20)

KING XERXES: Hoo boy, what a hangover. I can’t believe I was drunk for a week. But whoa, what a party! You should have seen everybody—on the floor, the chandeliers. Man, were we baked. Oooh, if only I could remember what happened.

MEMUCAN (KING’S LOYAL SERVANT): Uh, hate to tell you this, King, but when you were drunk you attempted to publicly humiliate your wife by having her parade around in front of you so all your drunk cronies could check out her hot bod.

KING XERXES: Oh. I did that? Well, what happened?

MEMUCAN: She politely declined, your majesty.

KING XERXES: (long pause) Hmmmm, so what happened then? I’d like to see her soon.

MEMUCAN: You signed an irrevocable royal degree saying that she could never ever be in your sight again. She’s completely banished from your presence for the rest of her life.

KING XERXES: (longer pause) Really? Are you sure? I really liked her.

MEMUCAN: Really.

KING XERXES: Rats. So, uh, what do I do now for a wife?

MEMUCAN: Well. Why not have a huge beauty contest where you line up all the virgins in the country—thousands of them. Have a great big contest where you sleep with each one for a night, then they go into your harem, probably never to be seen again (their fathers, brothers, and boyfriends surely won’t mind). When the contest is over, you can pick the one you liked the most and make her your new queen.

KING XERXES: You know, Memucan, every once in a while you come up with a peach of an idea. Round up the virgins!

POINT: We make choices when BUZZED that mess up our lives, as well as the lives of others. Everybody has to live with the consequences.

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