All That's Wrong with the Bible: Contradictions, Absurdities, and More by Jonah David Conner

Author:Jonah David Conner [Conner, Jonah David]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2017-09-15T04:00:00+00:00

2.2 Theological absurdities

1] Yahweh regretted making man and was “sorry in his heart.” Gen.6:6.

It is completely illogical that an omniscient god with a perfect plan would regret anything. It was a surprise that man turned out exactly how he was created to turn out? Even if it only means Yahweh was saddened, as some claim, it still does not make sense given that he would have known the outcome from the beginning.

2] Moses reasoned with Yahweh and convinced him to change his mind. Ex.32:9-14.

The god of Israel became angry and threatened to kill them all due to their obstinacy, so Moses pleaded with him to remember his promises and to consider what Egypt would think if they found out. Yahweh then relented and changed his mind.

3] Yahweh acted like an adolescent. Ex.32:34; Ex.33:2-5.

Yahweh told Moses to go on ahead to the Promised Land without him, and he would not accompany them because they were “a stubborn people” and he “might destroy [them] along the way.”

4] Iron chariots were too much for Yahweh. Jud.1:19.

“Yahweh was with the Israelites but they couldn’t drive out those who lived in the plain because they had chariots of iron.” No part of this makes sense.

5] Moses reasoned with Yahweh and convinced him a second time. Num.14:10-23.

Angry with the Israelites’ complaints about the desert, Yahweh declared to Moses that he would “strike them down with a plague and destroy them.” Moses then reminded him he could not do that because the Egyptians would hear about it and tell everyone how he was not able to get his people to the Promised Land. Yahweh then rescinded and decided to just bar everyone over 20 years of age from entering the land.

6] Yahweh lost his temper and killed 14,700 people in the process. Num.16:41-50.

The people complained about Moses, so Yahweh threatened to kill all of them at once (again). Moses told Aaron to “quick, go get a censor and intercede for the people.” Aaron did so, but only after Yahweh had already killed 14,700 people in a plague. His incense stopped the slaughter.

7] Yahweh sent an evil spirit to torment Saul who later tried to kill David. I Sam.16:14; I Sam.18:10.

Not only is there the issue of an evil spirit tormenting at Yahweh’s bidding, but also that the same spirit later prompted Saul to try and kill David, the future anointed who would be one of the most important figures outside of Christ.

8] Yahweh created evil. Is.45:7.

“I make peace and create evil. I the Lord do all these things.” The Hebrew word “create” here is the same as in Genesis 1:1, and “evil” is identical to that used in Genesis 3:5,22. Many translators unsurprisingly have chosen “calamity” over “evil” in an attempt to minimize the absurdity, but there is absolutely no linguistic reason to do this. “I, Yahweh, create evil” is a perfectly accurate translation and is exactly how the Septuagint reads as well. Even if it possibly could mean merely “calamity,” that still presents a problem since

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