Nanny I Want to Mate: A Single Dad Romance by Mia Kayla

Author:Mia Kayla [Kayla, Mia]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: MAM Books LLC
Published: 2020-12-09T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 23

Becky

I hated this. The silence, the distance, the unnatural way we floated around each other. For the past few days, we would go about our routine, but in separate headspaces, no longer connected, no longer enjoying each other’s company. It was misery. I was starting to question everything. But I couldn’t be forthcoming with Charles. I just couldn’t. Which meant this silence might continue forever.

I can do this, right? Stay here, with this tension in my chest every time I saw him?

I shook my head, watching the girls swim in their Olympic-sized pool.

I had to do this. This was my job. Now, all I had to do was keep things strictly professional between Charles and me, and I’d be fine.

I walked closer to the edge of the pool, seeing my reflection in the ripple of water. Just being this close made a hollow pit in my stomach. I hated the water. It held so much of my fears, brought back so many unwanted memories.

Paul.

I squeezed my eyes shut to dispel his name, his face, his memory. I wanted no part of him in my life, not even a sliver.

After school, the girls had asked if they could go swimming, and I wanted to tell them no. I wanted to take them anywhere else. I wanted to offer them ice cream instead or take them to the local fudge shop.

The first thing I asked was if they could swim, to which they both replied, “Yes.”

So, even though I didn’t know how to swim, I’d told them as long as they stayed in the shallow part, then I would allow it.

It was an unusually warm fall day. What I’d learned in the short time I’d lived in Illinois was that the temperature could change twenty degrees within a span of a few days. Today, it was eighty-five degrees, so the kids wanted to take advantage of the warmer weather. I guessed it really didn’t matter, as the pool was heated.

So, as the sun beat down fiercely on the exposed skin of my one-piece, I slathered Mary and Sarah with sunscreen and then myself and watched them swim back and forth, splashing, enjoying each other and the water, as they should.

I stood at the side, arms crossed like a lifeguard, knowing that if anything were to happen to the girls, I’d most likely die, trying to save them.

Sarah was on her swim team, so I wasn’t worried about her, and even though Mary had said she could swim, I wasn’t risking it and had her wearing floaties.

“Becky, get in,” Sarah tried to coax me, eyes alight, floating on her back.

“I think I’m okay here.” I lifted my hair and secured it to the top of my head in a high bun. It was a muggy day, and if I actually knew how to swim, jumping in would have been a good idea.

“Look at me! I can hold my breath underwater.” Mary stuck her head under the surface, and I walked farther down to where she was, anxiety prickling my skin.

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