Finding Peace After a Suicide Loss by Elaine Kennelly

Author:Elaine Kennelly [Elaine Kennelly]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Morgan James Publishing
Published: 2021-09-15T00:00:00+00:00

The Trouble with My Way

Let’s return to the book of Genesis, but not to Adam and Eve this time. Let’s focus on Abram and Sarai. God tells this couple that they will be the father and mother of the entire Hebrew nation. Yes, they will have a son, and their descendants will be as numerous as the stars in the sky. The only problem from a human perspective was they were both well past childbearing years, and they had no children at that present time. Plus, God did not give them any details, such as when and how this incredible event would take place.

So Sarai starts thinking. And she thinks up a plan that sounds reasonable within the framework of the culture she lived in. Her handmaiden, an Egyptian girl named Hagar, could be the surrogate mother. Sarai tells Abram to go sleep with Hagar, reasoning, “perhaps I can build a family through her.”79 Abram thinks for a moment and then agrees with Sarai. Does this husband-wife interaction have a familiar ring? One spouse presents the other with an unwise action, and the other one agrees to it. Shades of Adam and Eve.

A baby is conceived, and Hagar, the surrogate mother, despises Sarai. In return, Sarai treats Hagar cruelly. Hagar runs away, but God knows exactly where she is and sends the angel of the LORD to tell her that she must return home, but not without a blessing: “ ‘I will give you more descendants than you can count,’ ” God tells her.80 So Abram, who we now call Abraham, is also the father of Hagar’s child, Ishmael, and the Arab nation is born.

Did Sarai’s plan work? No.

Did it cause problems immediately? Yes.

Has it caused problems throughout the ages? Yes. We are still in conflict over the land possessed by the Jews and Arabs.

Did God have a better plan? Undeniably, yes.

How does all of this pertain to you and your struggle today?

Grieving through a suicide, without God, is like trying to fix your world through the way you think. It will never happen. You will never be successful on your own. Suicide grieving always involves a spiritual struggle with God because life and death are uniquely in his domain. After any death, grieving is not easy, and it provides in its path ample room for spiritual conflict. Now anytime there is a spiritual battle, satan is on the scene, and he is fighting against you through deceit, accusations, and outright lies. He will tempt you; he will twist Bible passages; he will keep the truth from you and even make you sick. But God is more powerful than satan!

Here is the huge mistake I made: I thought I knew it all, especially in the area of religion. I knew all about God, just like the Pharisees in Jesus’s time. Like a tea bag, I was steeped in the dreadful sin of pride. Not only did satan lie to me and twist the truth, but I lied to myself and was content to do that.

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