Feeling Good Together: The Secret to Making Troubled Relationships Work by David D. Burns

Author:David D. Burns [Burns, David D.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780767930901
Publisher: Potter/TenSpeed/Harmony
Published: 2008-12-23T07:00:00+00:00

You’re right, Richard. I could have parked over there, and that would have saved time. At the same time, I’m feeling a bit put down right now because there’s a sharp edge in your voice, and it seems like you’re annoyed with me. Can we talk about it?

In this response, Barry accepts Richard’s criticism while bringing the hidden hostility out into the open in a direct but gentle way. He asks if Richard is annoyed and respectfully expresses his own feelings. This is a skillful example of Inquiry.

At first, this type of direct communication may be uncomfortable for them because they’re both used to avoiding conflict. If they begin to talk about their feelings more openly, they’ll have the chance to experience real closeness for the first time in years.

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