You Can't Lose Them All by Sal Iacono & Jimmy Kimmel
Author:Sal Iacono & Jimmy Kimmel [Iacono, Sal & Kimmel, Jimmy]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Grand Central Publishing
Published: 2021-01-12T00:00:00+00:00
GOOD NIGHT, JON HAMM
I have been playing fantasy football for almost thirty years, and I can say without hesitation that itâs the greatest game ever invented. I mean, what are the other options? Monopoly? Jenga? Strip poker? None are even close to stacking up. In fact, forget about games. Fantasy football might be the greatest cultural phenomenon of all time. The idea that you can assign point values to real players in a fake league with all of your semi-legitimate friends canât be topped.
Having participated in leagues where entry fees range from gratis to several thousand dollars, I can confirm that fantasy sports is not about the money but instead about the bravado of being able to brag to your pals that you are more knowledgeable than them. When you break it down, after research, drafts, time spent thinking about moves, add/drops, and arguments over email, you are setting yourself up to win first prize at an average rate of $3 per hour. I know there are people who win a million dollars in high-stakes leagues, but for the most part youâd be much better off making macramé plant hangers from home than attempting to earn a living off of fantasy football.
I assembled my first fantasy football league in 1992. I was a junior in college and thought it would be a good way to make worlds collide between my high school and college chums. Harry, Larry, and Paulie from Oswego State would meet up with a bunch of my buddies on Long Island. We set up a weird and archaic format. A running back had to reach fifty yards to get 3 points. One hundred yards warranted 5 points. A quarterback didnât get points until he hit two hundred yards passing. This was before decimals were figured in. Iâm not even sure decimals had been invented yet. We barely knew how to use round numbers.
I would score by hand. I took pride in it, but living on the East Coast was rough for the official tabulator. The results of the Monday night game wouldnât hit the local papers until Wednesday morning, which meant that oftentimes I would have to take matters into my own hands. I remember calling the New York Daily News sports editor on a Tuesday morning in the fall of 1994:
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