What Makes You Beautiful by Bridget Liang

Author:Bridget Liang
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: James Lorimer and Company Ltd., Publishers
Published: 2019-01-29T00:00:00+00:00

* * *

Morning comes and I feel more normal. I check my phone and see messages from all of the guys. They wonder where I disappeared to. And Jennifer apologizes that her phone battery died while she was on her date.

I respond to the guys, saying I’m alive but went home a little early. I feel like I’d ruin their amazing nights if I tell them what happened to me so I don’t mention it. Then I ask Jennifer if we can talk about something that happened at the dance. She messages me back, saying we can talk when we get to school.

While taking the Bloor subway, I have time to think about what happened. The whole thing with that guy was pretty bad. I’ve never felt as dirty and ugly as I did last night. Yet for some reason, I’m not feeling that upset over being groped and hearing creepy racist things. At least, that’s not all that I’m upset about.

When I arrive at Rosedale, I seek out Jennifer right away. As usual, she has her leather jacket on. Her lips are painted gold today. She offers me a hug and then pulls me into her arms. “Hey, so what went down at Buddies?” Her tone of voice makes me think I must look fragile.

I frown. “I almost hooked up with a guy. It wasn’t good.”

“Oh, honey. Did he force himself on you?” Her forehead is creased with concern.

I explain as best I can what went on. From the ways everyone went out to dance to the guy coming on pretty strong. Kyle and Stephanie coming out of a bathroom. The kissing and the grope. And a little on how it made me feel.

When I’m done telling everything, I look at Jennifer. She seems pretty angry. “If I ever meet this guy,” she says, “I’m cutting off his balls. He’s scum. Racist scum. And everything he did was not okay! You deserve better. So much better!”

“I don’t know about that . . .” I mumble. “Maybe I’m too weird to be dateable.”

Jennifer doesn’t look like she believes that. “Remember when I told you about all those girls not into me? I’ve been where you’ve been. From the moment I came out, all the cool, trendy queer girls didn’t see me as sexy enough to date. No matter how fabulous I dress, they end up dating girls who look nothing like me. One of them asked me if I came out to get attention. She wanted to know why I hadn’t kissed a girl yet. She didn’t get that I don’t have unlimited choices. I don’t know how I met Jin-Seon, but I feel blessed.”

It’s my chance to change the topic and lighten the mood. “So could you tell me more about your date with Jin-Seon? You two sound really cute together. Cuter even than Robin and Micah. But don’t tell them I said that.”

It works. Jennifer tells me how she and Jin-Seon went to the Bata Shoe Museum. She gushes about how much of a weirdo nerd Jin-Seon is.

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