The Yellow Note by M. J. Padgett

Author:M. J. Padgett [M. J. Padgett]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Secret Author Publications
Published: 2022-06-14T00:00:00+00:00

We tried to make it work, and it did for the entire summer. We spoke on the phone every day, texted, emailed, and video chatted. We did whatever we could to keep the feeling we had with each other alive, but when school started back, it became increasingly difficult to find the time to do those things. We played phone tag more than we spoke, and he was distant when we did. To be fair, so was I.

As much as I cared for John, I knew deep down it wouldn’t work. If we were in college, a short drive from New York to New Haven, I fully believed we could have figured out a way to make it work. But we weren’t in college, and we weren’t a short drive from each other. I was a high school junior, eight hours away from her high school senior boyfriend, and since he’d gotten early acceptance to Yale, he would be thirteen hours away within a year.

It simply wouldn’t work, so I figured it would be better to rip the band-aid off and get it over with. That evening when he called, his voice had the same sadness I’d heard on the beach, and I knew he was thinking the same thing.

“So, I’ve been thinking,” he started.

“I know, John. It’s okay.” I let him off the hook and accepted what was to come.

“It doesn’t mean I don’t care about you. I like you so much, Conor, but it just gets harder every day. I miss you.”

Why couldn’t he just be a jerk? Why couldn’t he just go find another girl and make me hate him, so it would be easy to move on? Why did he have to be so wonderful?

“I feel the same way. We’re young. It’s not meant to be this hard.” The conversation lasted for another hour, neither of us wanting to put the final nail in the coffin, but I finally hammered it in.

“I should go. I have a ton of work to do still.” The length of silence from the other end of the line fast approached the point I thought he had already hung up when he finally spoke.

“So, I guess… maybe I’ll see you around if you get into Columbia?” His voice was shaky. He wanted to hang on as much as I did.

“Yeah, I should know something soon. I’m sure we’ll talk again, right?”

“Sure, yeah. I’m sure we will,” he agreed.

We didn’t. I never heard a word from John until I ran into him at Shay’s college graduation ceremony. That chapter of my life closed with the dead line.

***

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