The Way Out by Alan Gordon & Alon Ziv

Author:Alan Gordon & Alon Ziv [Gordon, Alan & Ziv, Alon]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Publishing Group
Published: 2021-08-24T00:00:00+00:00

Feeling Trapped

In fall 2006, I flew to New York to attend a conference. I was looking forward to the trip. I remember feeling excited as I settled into the window seat with a handful of magazines. I had made great strides with my back pain and was ready for the flight. Or so I thought.

Fifteen minutes after sitting down, my back started hurting. I shifted around for a bit, but the pain was getting worse and worse. I knew there was only one way to get any relief: I needed to stand up and stretch my back. But when I looked over, to my horror, the guy in the middle seat was sleeping. They had just finished the safety demonstration—how was he already asleep? I was trapped.

My back was hurting already, and feeling trapped put my brain on high alert, which made the pain worse. I tried different positions. I tried sitting on my jacket. I tried using my magazines for lumbar support. Nothing helped. The rest of the flight was agony.

Most chronic pain sufferers have experienced the frustration of feeling trapped by their symptoms. It’s something I see a lot in my patients that contributes to an overall sense of high alert, which makes their pain worse.

When I described the Process, I told you to use avoidance behaviors when your pain level is high. So try not to put yourself in situations where you can’t practice your avoidance behaviors. Feeling trapped interferes with the Process and injects extra danger into your brain.

I made it through my flight. And I’m not going to lie, it was rough. The guy next to me woke up right before landing. He looked happy and refreshed. Part of me wanted to stuff him into the overhead compartment, but I didn’t. However, I did learn a valuable lesson about feeling trapped.

The first thing I did when I landed was change my seat on the return flight so that I was sitting on the aisle. It made all the difference in the world. I could stand up, stretch, or walk to the bathroom whenever I wanted. In the end, I needed to get out of my seat only a couple of times, but knowing that I could helped me feel calm and safe.

I once had a patient with chronic dry mouth. Whenever he was stuck somewhere without easy access to a drink, he felt trapped. His anxiety would shoot through the roof and make his symptoms worse. He started carrying a bottle of water with him wherever he went. Sometimes it was inconvenient, but it made him feel safe and in control.

Another patient had joint pain and felt trapped in social situations where he had to stand for long periods of time. He and his wife had always loved going to cocktail parties with their friends, but now he started to fear them. It was hard to focus on conversations with his friends because he was panicking on the inside. “How much longer are we going

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