The Typo by Emily Kerr

Author:Emily Kerr [Kerr, Emily]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780008653095
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers

Chapter Sixteen

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Date: 4 Feb, 02:02

Subject: Phone call

Hi Cameron,

I have something to confess to you

I stared at the words on the screen for a solid minute before I lost courage, hit the delete button, and slammed my laptop shut. Perhaps it was better to sleep on it before I rushed into doing something I might later regret. I gently scooped up Eliza, who was still out for the count on my lap, and deposited her on the sofa next to her brother. He blearily opened an eye to see what was going on, let out a dainty but pointed yawn so I knew that he didn’t approve of me disturbing him, and then went back to sleep.

Alas, it wasn’t so easy for me to switch off. I lay in bed, as wide awake as if it was the middle of the day, replaying my conversation with Cameron and wondering what I should do now. My guilt had grown exponentially. Throughout the email exchanges, I’d somehow managed to gloss over the fact that it was a real human being I’d been communicating with, someone with the capacity to get hurt through my thoughtless behaviour. Now that I’d heard his voice and felt the things I’d felt, the situation was different. I liked the guy. Really liked him. And he’d seemed to like me too. But whatever we had or could have, friendship, or perhaps even something more, it was built on false foundations. He valued honesty and I had been lying pretty much from the start.

I should probably say something. But what exactly? That the person he’d been communicating with was a work of fiction? That the real Amy Cameron was a shadow of the person she should be, too frightened to achieve any of the accomplishments that had been so casually talked about, too trapped in her ways to know how to make things better. That was guaranteed to frighten him off, if the very act of confessing to having been deceitful wasn’t enough to make him block my email address and never want to hear from me again. I knew I owed him the truth, but how to bring it up without the danger of losing him altogether?

By the time my alarm went off to signal it was time to get up and get ready for work, I’d come to a decision. I couldn’t bear the thought of my correspondence with Cameron ending in this way. But equally, it was not right for me to carry on playing so freely with the truth. I was going to be honest from now on. No more pretending I was Miss Violin Big Shot, no more references to amazing fictional nights out. Whatever I told Cameron from now on was going to be one hundred percent true, no marketing exaggerations, no positive spin. And if that meant that he lost interest in me, then that was the way things had to be. But coward that I was, my new policy of honesty wouldn’t include confessing to my previous glossy depictions of my life.

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