The Taylor Turbochaser by David Baddiel

Author:David Baddiel [Baddiel, David]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollinsPublishers
Published: 2019-09-20T17:00:00+00:00

Meanwhile, the traffic jam had continued to stand still.

Amy looked at the new handles.

“What do I do?” she said. “Driving-wise, I mean.”

Rahul shrugged. “It’s just changed the shape a bit. So more or less what you’ve been doing.”

“But more dodgy-inny-outy with the cars in front,” said Janet.

“‘Dodgy-inny-outy’?” said Jack. “Is that a thing?”

Amy gripped the direction lever.

“We’re about to find out!”

She pushed the lever. The Taylor TurboChaser shot forward. Amy swerved it to the right. Cars and trucks were stuck all over the road, so it wasn’t easy for her to understand which direction to head for.

Not only that, but all the other drivers – in the way that drivers do when they’re in traffic jams – were constantly moving their vehicles about, trying to gain small little bits of ground.

Plus there were cars coming the other way.

So, once again, Amy slalomed.

“INNY!” shouted Janet, as Amy went to the inside of the lorry in front.

“OUTY!” shouted Janet, joined by Rahul, as Amy swerved back across the bus in front of the lorry.

“INNY!” shouted Janet and Rahul, as Amy went left again, and this time Jack, with a face and voice that said “I’m doing this sarcastically”, joined in.

“DODGY!” shouted Janet and Rahul and Jack, as Amy’s weaving in and out of the traffic continued.

Within a few minutes, Amy was at the front of the traffic queue. She looked round. To her side sat an old man and an old woman in one of those cars that have a normal car front and a wooden back. There were indeed some roadworks that were causing the jam. A not-very-proper-looking set of traffic lights sat in front of them, where nobody was working.

“Hello!” said the old man. He had on a flat cap. “You seem a little young to be out driving on this fine day, but perhaps it’s just my eyes.”

“They aren’t what they were, are they, Mr Hancock?” said the old woman.

“Ooh! Who said that?” said the old man, looking round.

“Ha ha! Very good, Mr Hancock. You’re as funny as you ever were!”

“Ha ha! Many thanks, Mrs Hancock.”

Amy smiled back at them.

“What a lovely smile, Mr Hancock …”

“I agree, Mrs Hancock.”

“What kind of car is this, young lady with the lovely smile?”

“He built it,” said Amy, pointing at Rahul, who was blushing. “From my wheelchair.”

“Ha ha, we’ve got another joker here, Mr Hancock! Young lady says her car is a wheelchair.”

“No, it really is,” said Amy. “Actually the wheelchair is still in here. But Rahul … added to it.”

“Golly,” said Mr Hancock. “What an ingenious fellow.”

“I agree, Mr H.”

“Hey …” said Jack, who was looking behind them at the rest of the traffic jam. “I hate to break up the love-in with the married couple from Up, but …”

“What?” said Rahul.

“Can I borrow the Binocuscope?”

“Yes,” said Rahul, handing it over. Jack put it up to his eyes and looked out of the back of the TurboChaser.

“OK … I’m pretty sure … that’s Mum’s van.”

“Where?” said Amy.

“At the back of the traffic jam!”

“Oh my days …” said Janet.

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