The Power of Self-Compassion: Using Compassion-Focused Therapy to End Self-Criticism and Build Self-Confidence by Mary Welford

Author:Mary Welford [Welford, Mary]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Self-Help, Personal Growth, self-esteem
ISBN: 9781572249837
Google: 4zGCMAEACAAJ
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
Published: 2013-11-15T23:42:18.895523+00:00

Settling Your Mind and Body

In chapters 7 and 8, you were encouraged to explore mindfulness, soothing-rhythm breathing, and a place of contentment. Through the process of engaging with such exercises, it is likely that you developed your own way of settling your mind and body before you began. When prompted, engage in those things that you find to be helpful.

Reflection on Exercise 27

As this is the first exercise that looks specifically at the experience of compassion, you may find it challenging and require further practice before you feel you can recognize the feeling within your mind and body.

Although the compassionate-mind approach aims to create a compassionate mindset, it also pays particular attention to the associated physical sensations, because mind and body are closely connected. Our mindset affects the way we feel physically. For example, if we are in a threat mindset, our stomachs may churn, we may feel sick, tense, experience a sensation of pins and needles, or feel chest pain. The focus of our attention may turn to the way our bodies are feeling, and this may further increase the sense of threat. By contrast, in a compassionate mindset, we are likely to feel a sense of relaxed alertness, warmth, and strength in both mind and body. Hopefully, paying equal attention to each will create in you an enhanced sense of compassion.

You may have found that your posture and expression changed slightly during the exercise, or you may consciously have tried to change them. Some people report that with a change of posture they gain an increased sense of relaxation and warmth, together with more strength and alertness. Others say that they find they sit up straighter and develop a more relaxed facial expression, maybe with a half smile or a sense of warmth in their eyes (even if they are closed).

Exercise 28: Reexperiencing Your Own Compassion

Before doing this exercise, it may be helpful to spend a little time bringing to mind an occasion when you felt a sense of compassion or acted in a compassionate way. Try not to concentrate on a situation that could be charged with very strong emotions, as this may raise all sorts of confusing feelings within you. Instead, start with something that is neither charged with strong emotions nor devoid of them. Usually people find that it is easier to think about a situation where they felt compassion toward someone else than it is to recall a situation where they felt compassion toward themselves. Maybe you can remember a time when you helped someone in need: a child who was hurt or someone who was going through a difficult time.

Find a place where you can be for ten to fifteen minutes that is, as far as possible, free from distractions. Sit in a relaxed, open posture that has strength or alertness in it. Close your eyes or settle your gaze on a low fixed point.

Now bring to mind a time when you felt compassion toward someone or acted in a compassionate way…recalling the

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