The Awakened Introvert (A New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook) by Arnie Kozak

Author:Arnie Kozak [Kozak, Arnie]
Language: eng
Format: azw3
ISBN: 9781626251625
Publisher: New Harbinger Publications
Published: 2015-04-30T16:00:00+00:00

Building Your Solitude Skills

We’ve looked at solitude in your life alone, together with an intimate other, and in the world at large. As you know, the extrovert-dominated culture tends to confuse solitude with loneliness: “Why would you want to spend that much time alone?” Our culture mistakes being alone with being lonely. After all, one is supposed to be the loneliest number. This is an unfortunate confusion. Being alone is seen as pathetic. It is something to pity and avoid at all costs. It is as if people are phobic about being alone, and after a lifetime of trying to avoid solitude or being told that it’s aberrant, it might be hard to embrace solitude in a positive light. Thoreau in Walden echoed a similar sentiment when he observed, “I never found the companion that was so companionable as solitude. We are for the most part more lonely when we go abroad among men than when we stay in our chambers” (Thoreau 2004, 131). You can be lonelier in a crowd than you are keeping your own company. Thoreau favors the quality over the quantity of social contacts and places value on the company kept with oneself. Solitude can be your foundation for reaching out to the world, and without enough solitude in your life, you may feel out of balance, depleted, and lost. To keep your solitude foundation, in this culture that rarely values it, let’s look at some attitudes and skills that will help you wholeheartedly embrace solitude.

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