Still Going It Alone by Michele Howe

Author:Michele Howe
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781598564952
Publisher: Hendrickson Publishers
Published: 2009-09-15T00:00:00+00:00

Ready, Set, Adjust!

Step back, literally and figuratively, and evaluate your life. Don’t be afraid to retrace your steps (or make an about-face) in an effort to step into positive plans for the future. Angie wasn’t sure about moving back in with her mom after all these years of living on her own. But she realized that it wasn’t cost-efficient to continue living in her four-bedroom home by herself. She had briefly considered asking another single mom to move in and share expenses, but again, Angie wasn’t sure she would feel comfortable living with a friend, even a good friend. On the other hand, Angie and her mom got along well together. Neither one was intrusive or overbearing. It might work. Her mom’s home was certainly big enough to accommodate most of Angie’s favorite home furnishings too. Angie’s mom had “made room” for this very possibility when she revamped the house a few years back, when Angie’s dad required wheelchair access to the house. They even had a contractor build an in-laws attached bungalow . . . for themselves. Always thinking ahead, that’s my mom, Angie smiled. Now, Dad’s gone and Mom prefers the smaller cordoned-off section of the house to ensure her own privacy. She knows my kids will be visiting on weekends, and she, like me, wants a private place of retreat. Since Mom doesn’t want to leave the family homestead and I want to leave an inheritance to my kids, this just might be the best way to achieve both ends.

Research and record a new plan of action. Invite others who are succeeding at what you want to do to act as your guides, mentors, and cheerleaders (or you can learn by their mistakes). Helen felt stuck. Even though she had recently been offered a promotion at work in the HR department at her city’s most reputable senior facilitator, Helen wanted more flexibility to travel and to visit her out-of-town grandchildren. Though she had worked hard to get to the place where she could run the department, Helen now wondered if that’s what she truly wanted. She’d watched a friend and colleague’s life alter dramatically after taking a similar post, and Helen remembered promising herself never to give in to the temptation of a more prestigious position at the cost of sacrificing her private life. This promotion, if Helen accepted it, would demand longer hours through the week and some on-call weekends. She took a good long, hard look at her finances; even though this promotion meant a raise, it would detract from her quality of life. No, Helen determined, I have enough to live and retire on. Five years ago, before my kids had kids, I might have jumped at this promotion. But today, it just doesn’t seem to matter that much to me. My goals have changed, so have my priorities. Any gain in money would be a loss in precious freedom and flexibility, and you can’t quantify time spent with people you love.

Move toward change and ask for accountability.

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