Risen Motherhood by Emily Jensen
Author:Emily Jensen
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780736976237
Publisher: Harvest House Publishers
1 Genesis 1:31.
2 Genesis 1:29; 2:16-17.
3 Leviticus 11:1-47.
4 Genesis 3:17-19.
5 Mark 7:18-19.
6 Romans 14:7-8.
7 Galatians 6:14.
8 Romans 8:20-23.
9 Isaiah 65:21-23.
10 Isaiah 25:6.
11 Romans 14:1-4.
12 Romans 14:3-4.
13 1 Timothy 4:8.
14 1 Timothy 4:3-5.
11
THE GOSPEL AND OUR RELATIONSHIPS
Emily
When our first child was just over six months old, my husband and I prepared to spend our first night away. Naturally, I wrote the grandparents a handbook.
Hereâs a small quote from the section on sleeping (yes, the handbook had so many topics, it needed sections):
He goes to bed between 7:00 and 8:00 p.m. Watch for tired signals! Putting him to bed closer to 7:00 or 7:30 p.m. is best. If youâre going to give him a bath, start it after 6:30 so it can lead into the bedtime routine. Hereâs the rest of the routine: Go into a dimly lit room, give him a clean diaper, put on pajamas, put on the sleep sack, give him a bottle, give him a pacifier, and rock him to sleep. Lay him down on his back when he is drowsy but still awake with no blankets or animals in his crib. If his white noise is on and the room is dark, he will generally go straight to bed or will do so with minimal crying.
Itâs okay to laugh at me. Iâm laughing at me (and most likely, so were Grandma and Grandpa). My intentions for this handbook seemed good. I wanted my son to have the comforts of Mommy and Daddy in the arms of other quality caregivers. But underneath that layer of good intentions, my harmful heart attitudes demandedâ¦
âGrandma and Grandpa need to meet my expectations in order to love my son and make me happy.â
âI am the only person who knows how to care for my child. Anyone else will do an insufficient job of meeting his needs.â
âAnyone who respects me will adhere to all of my ways and preferences.â
Those phrases didnât make it into the handbook, but my expectations, preferences, and standards were a recipe for relational strain.
Both sets of grandparents showed patience as we worked out the kinks in this new aspect of our relationship, but the process wasnât without bumps. As youâd imagine, they couldnât always follow our rules. We didnât always have fair expectations. We couldnât communicate or understand one another perfectly every time.
Years later, Iâm doing good if I provide instructions as I hand off all the big and little ones to grandparents, hollering âThanksâsee ya later!â as Iâm walking out the door. We still communicate the essentials, but Iâm getting better at trusting God, trusting others (who are worthy of trust), and recognizing I donât own a patent on the one right way of caregiving.
Cultureâs Message: Momâs Way or the Highway
Relationships in motherhood are complicated. Thereâs tension with the grandparents for not following your snack schedule, awkwardness with your friend at church who thinks kids should always be in service when youâre fine utilizing the nursery, uncomfortable conversations with the mom who thinks breastfeeding can always work if
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