Layers by Nathaniel Branden

Author:Nathaniel Branden [Branden, Nathaniel]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2020-07-26T22:00:00+00:00

I was in the eleventh week of my affair with Tracy and I was beginning to feel that, miraculously, I was going to carry off our wonderful adventure, with no tragedy for anyone, when Adrienne turned to me, in the midst of a Sunday afternoon walk through Central Park, and said brightly, “How would you feel about running away with me for a two-week vacation?”

“Where do you want to go?” I instantly responded, ignoring the chaos of conflicting emotions rising within me. Two weeks without Tracy!

“Somewhere in the Tuscany region of Italy, perhaps a little village near the foot of the mountains,” she answered. “Not too far north of Florence, so we could drive down to visit the museums and galleries.”

“The distances are not that great,” I said thoughtfully. “We could even drive to Pietrasanta if you’d like.”

“Oh, darling, I would love that! You’re really willing to drop everything and just come away with me?”

The wording of her question made me uneasy. What was the “everything” I was presumed to be dropping?”

“Sounds great,” I said.

“Your mistress won’t mind?” Adrienne asked smilingly.

“No. She’s very understanding, very good-natured, in fact.”

“Lucky for you. Lucky for me.”

It occurred to me lately that while there was nothing new about her making jokes about my “mistress”—it had become something of a gag between us—in the past month or so the frequency of her allusions to a “mistress” had greatly increased. I interpreted this to mean that my secret was safe and that she was merely being playful; I could not imagine her behaving in this manner if she knew the truth. Still, I was growing tenser as the conversation progressed and I concentrated on not allowing my tension to show.

To my astonishment, I realized that I wanted to go away with Adrienne. The prospect felt like a return to peace and sanity.

“There’s no need to cut you off totally from your work,” Adrienne said. “You can take your laptop with you.”

I froze at hearing these words. Once again I thought: trap—just as I thought it the night she proposed my taking a vacation from our marriage. Adrienne had commented more than once on how, when we returned home late at night, I went to my office to check for emails. “Why can’t that wait until morning?” she had asked me. “What are you expecting, Nicholas?”

“Nothing special. Just curious. I’ll only be a moment,” I had answered.

There were always one or more messages from Tracy waiting for me; and during the days when I could not see or speak to her, I lived for those messages.

Which is why, now, facing Adrienne, I said calmly, “No. I don’t want to take the laptop with me. For two weeks there’s going to be nothing but you and me.” I added, “No business.”

I saw her face soften as her eyes searched mine lovingly, and I was glad to have said what I said.

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