How to Grow Through What You Go Through by Jodie Cariss & Chance Marshall

Author:Jodie Cariss & Chance Marshall [Cariss, Jodie]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Penguin Random House UK
Published: 2022-04-12T00:00:00+00:00

THINGS YOU SHOULD KNOW ABOUT THERAPY:

» Make sure you select an accredited therapist. Use regulatory bodies like BACP (British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy) and UKCP (The UK Council for Psychotherapy).

» You don’t have to stick with the first therapist you meet. In your first session, you want to experience comfort. You want to feel the therapist has empathy, understanding and the ability to see ahead of you. A first session is not a lifelong commitment. Try not to put lots of pressure on it to go perfectly – or to stick with it if it wasn’t a good fit. Shop around.

» Make some time. Virtual sessions are brilliant because they allow you to slip therapy seamlessly into your daily routine, but it’s really important that you allow yourself some time before and after the session to sit with your feelings and digest them before diving into your next task.

» Sometimes you’re not going to like or enjoy therapy. It can be like going to the gym in that, more often than not, ‘having gone’ feels a lot better than the actual ‘going’.

» You won’t have a cinematic breakthrough in every session. It is slower than we all hope it to be; huge epiphanies are rare and don’t happen as much as we see on the telly.

» It’s OK to write down what you want to talk about. Fifty minutes can be over in a flash. Spontaneity in the therapy room is incredibly important, but when you’re already feeling nervous and unsure of what to say in your early sessions, it’s OK to have a list of things you want to cover.

» Ask questions. It’s OK to be curious. It’s OK to question what your therapist is telling you. Therapy is a two-way street and it shouldn’t feel like you’ve taken the backseat in your sessions.

» Know that coaching and therapy are not the same. Coaching looks at the future, setting goals and thinking about things more practically. It is widely unmoderated as a profession and, unless stated, coaches do not have therapy experience.

» We don’t need to know the exact reason we are going to therapy. We can just arrive exactly as we are.

» Try not to pretend, lie or make things up. Practise saying what you are thinking and feeling. It’s your time; use it to your advantage. The person that gains from truthfulness is you.

» Level the playing field. You know yourself best – the therapist is there to guide, support and challenge. If something doesn’t feel right or helpful, call it out. (We spoke with someone once who’d had nine months of therapy with an elderly therapist who had slept through most of their 50-minute sessions and they had not said anything, believing it was part of the process that they didn’t understand!)

» If you do decide to leave therapy after a number of sessions, it’s useful for you if you make that clear to the therapist, so you can discuss and plan the ending. This

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