Heart of Joy by Lisa Swinton

Author:Lisa Swinton [Swinton, Lisa]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2019-12-02T18:30:00+00:00

CHAPTER FIVE

Joy didn’t have butterflies gently fluttering through her stomach—more like angry bees dancing a conga line. She adjusted her Santa hat for the millionth time in the backstage dressing room.

“Quit fidgeting,” Tatiana said. “You’re making me nervous.” Tatiana never got nervous before performances. She usually got more hyped up.

“Sorry.”

Tatiana applied another coat of mascara to her natural and false lashes.

“Yeah, what gives?” Marcy applied red lipstick.

Joy shifted from one foot to the other. Tatiana knew from their friendship that Joy typically turned into a hermit in December. She’d urged Joy to “get over it—whatever it is—and join in the holiday spirit.”

“Does it have anything to do with a certain tall, dark, and hunky cowboy?” Tatiana shot her a sly smile.

“No.” Her answer came out a little too quickly, and Tatiana raised a brow. Joy took a deep breath. “Cason is great, but I wanted to tell you why I struggle at Christmas time.” After the hospital, Cason had urged Joy to share her pain with her group. He said they could better support her if they understood.

Her words caught the girls’ attention.

Joy fingered her shiny black belt with the gold buckle. “My mom and I didn’t celebrate Christmas growing up. No tree. No lights. No gifts.”

“No.” Tatiana covered her mouth with three fingers. “I knew your childhood was rough in Chicago, but I didn’t know it was that rough.”

“Hush. Let Joy talk.” Marcy waved an encouraging hand at Joy.

“It wasn’t that we weren’t church goers. The true meaning of Christmas was instilled in me by my mom. But the hardest things that happened in my life all occurred at Christmas, including my mom being killed by muggers.”

“Have mercy,” Marcy said.

Tatiana shot her a ‘shut up’ look.

Both women took Joy’s hands.

Joy continued. “That’s why I faded out at rehearsal when we got to the carols. Christmas is a time for pain, not a time for joy, regardless of what my name suggests.” She let out a long exhale. “I wanted you to know. I hope you understand.”

“I don’t think we could ever understand what you’ve been through,” said Marcy. “But we can be here for you.”

“Yeah, girl. We got you,” Tatiana said.

The three women embraced, all wiping at their eyes.

Tatiana waved at her lashes. “No crying. I’ll have to redo my mascara.”

“There’s one more thing, and I need your help,” Joy said.

“Anything,” Marcy checked her makeup in the mirror.

“I’d like to find a way to turn my aversion to the season around. I’m not sure how to do that. Baby steps for sure. But I hope you’ll help me on my journey to making the season bright.”

“You want to sing lead on the carols today?” Marcy asked.

“No, not yet. Maybe by the end of the festival. I think we should stick with the current arrangement. But perhaps you could help me find a present for Cason. He’s been really great about opening my eyes to yuletide cheer, and I’ve never bought a Christmas gift before. Until the service at the hospital, I’d never even wrapped a present.

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