Godly Heathens by H.E. Edgmon

Author:H.E. Edgmon
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: St. Martin's Publishing Group

16

I’M MAKING THIS UP AS I GO

I spend the weekend at Willa Mae’s, hiding out and waiting for the other shoe to drop.

It’s as weird as the last time. Her grandparents hover, popping in constantly to see if they can get us anything. On Saturday, I catch Willa Mae and her grandfather arguing in the hallway. When they see me, the conversation ends abruptly.

Later, when I’m lying on her bedroom floor—too afraid to sleep in the guest room, equally afraid of sharing the bed with her—I ask about it.

She shrugs. “He wants us to have a baby.”

“He—what now?”

“He’s convinced if they can’t have another, it’ll have to be me.”

It’s bizarre enough that it briefly takes my mind off of everything else.

“It doesn’t matter,” she continues. “I told him to drop it.”

She looks worried, though, her eyes distant. She twists her hands over her lap, not looking at me.

“Your relationship with them is … weird.” An understatement. “Has it always been like this?”

“I didn’t meet them until last year.” She shrugs. “My mom cut them off before I was born. She thought they were crazy.”

“What about now? Did she come around when she realized—”

“She doesn’t know anything about this.” Willa Mae rolls over, offering me her back. “I’m tired.”

There’s so much I want to ask, but I know she’s not going to tell me. With a sigh, I roll over and grab my phone.

Over the last twenty-four hours or so, I’ve sent Enzo half a dozen texts.

you have no reason to believe me, and i have been the worst friend in the world the last few weeks. but there’s an explanation for everything. if you just call me, i can tell you what happened.

enzo, please. this can’t be how i lose you. you’re the most important person in the world to me. there’s stuff you don’t know—but i’m going to tell you all of it. call me.

you say you know when you’re not wanted, but do you have any idea when you ARE? i always want you. i want you so badly it scares me. on some level, you have to know that, right? you can’t honestly believe i found someone new and just moved on.

you have to know i’m in love with you.

and if you’re looking at my location and you see i’m in the swamp again, there’s a REASON for that. and you’re gonna have to CALL ME to find out what it is.

please.

So, there it is. In a frantic attempt at getting his attention, I’ve told Enzo how I feel. And if he ever calls, I’m going to tell him a lot more. Maybe he’ll call my mother and she’ll have me committed. Maybe he’ll believe me and want nothing to do with it. Or maybe Poppy and Marian will kill me tomorrow and he won’t ever know the truth. Either way, telling him is the only choice I have if I want to keep him—in whatever way he’ll have me.

What it means for the future, I don’t know.

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