Fireflies by David Morrell

Author:David Morrell
Language: eng
Format: mobi, epub
Tags: Canada, Autobiography, Death, Ewing's sarcoma Patients Canada Biography, Canadian 20th century Biography, Fathers and sons, Psychological aspects, Family Relationships, Health & Fitness, Diseases, Canadian - 20th century - Family relationships, Bereavement, Grief, Parenting, David - Family, Authors, Ewing's sarcoma, Ewing's sarcoma - Patients - Canada - Biography, Canadian, Biography: General, David, Family & Relationships, Patients, Fathers and sons - Canada, Children - Death - Psychological aspects, Cancer, Family, 20th century, Morrell, General, Literary Criticism, Fatherhood, Biography & Autobiography, Children, Biography
ISBN: 9780525246800
Publisher: Dutton
Published: 1988-09-28T07:00:00+00:00

DÉJÀ VU

1

“Of course, I feel panicked! Didn’t you listen! My son has cancer! Six months of chemotherapy! I watched him lose his hair! I held him while he vomited!”

“Take it easy,” the resident said.

“I watched him get weaker, watched him stagger, watched him get thinner! They tried every goddamned chemical they thought would work! He lost four ribs … a third of his lung! He had a bone marrow transplant! Three weeks ago, I didn’t even know what a bone marrow transplant was! They … !”

“Try to relax,” the neurologist said.

“If I don’t do something, Matt’s going to die!”

The nurse who’d rushed off with samples of David’s blood pulled open the curtain, entering the room. “His tests came back.”

The neurologist reached for the computer printout and scanned it. The resident peered over her shoulder.

“Look at those numbers,” the resident said, amazed.

“You found it?” David asked. “You know what’s wrong with—”

“These numbers indicate you’ve got—”

The neurologist interrupted. “The healthiest blood I’ve seen tested this year. Cholesterol—one hundred and seventy-nine. Well below the danger level. Creatinine—point nine.”

David had never heard of creatinine. He was sure the term was unfamiliar to him. And yet …

He recalled his seizure on the kitchen floor this morning. A shudder aggravated his tingling.

Creatinine, he understood suddenly, was an element in blood that indicated how well a patient’s kidneys were functioning. The lower the number, the more efficiently the kidneys were filtering poisons from the body.

How do I know this? David thought.

His 0.9 was excellent, David realized, as if he’d been taught it many years before. An average person had a creatinine level between 0.1 and 1.1. Over 1.1 meant the kidneys weren’t working as hard as they should. Over 3.0 meant the kidneys were failing. Over 4.0 meant the kidneys weren’t working at all. Unless emergency procedures were taken, the body’s toxins would accumulate to a fatal level.

In David’s nightmare on his kitchen floor—or in his memory, floating over his deathbed—when Matthew had contracted septic shock, one of the major consequences had been kidney damage. The kidneys had shut down totally (though temporarily, David had been told). Matthew’s urine had stopped completely. He’d been put on dialysis to vent excess fluid and filter toxins from his blood. But despite the dialysis, Matthew’s creatinine had risen to—dear God!—the lethal level of 4.5.

And even that hadn’t been what killed him!

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