Don't Let Her In by Joanne Ryan

Author:Joanne Ryan [Ryan, Joanne]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Boldwood Books
Published: 2024-04-18T00:00:00+00:00

19

SIMON

I still haven’t told Fi about the gambling, about the mess I’m in.

And this time, it’s not because I’m a coward – well, maybe I am a bit, but it’s not mainly that. The thing is, I don’t want to frighten her because I think they are trying to frighten me. Intimidate me. The thing is, I’ve missed a couple of payments now and have no hope of paying what I owe this week, even at the old rate. It’ll have gone up massively, too, because that’s what happens if you don’t pay: it doubles. Every week.

Before the guy handed over the money, he asked if I was sure I wanted it. I said of course I did, although even then, I had no idea how I’d pay it back if I didn’t win. I thought it was a pretty stupid question, too, because I was only borrowing it from them because I couldn’t get it from anywhere else; all other lines of credit were closed to me. But it didn’t matter; I was so certain I was going to win that it wouldn’t be a problem. I asked him what would happen if I missed a payment, but I only asked because I wanted him to give me the money so thought I had to at least look as if I was taking notice of what he said. I felt a bit uneasy when he replied; he smiled, but there was nothing nice about it. The smile was cold and never reached his eyes. He stared at me and said if you can’t pay it back, don’t borrow it. He kept a tight hold of the cash as he said it and I wanted that money so badly, I blurted out that I could easily pay it back and I was just having a temporary cash flow problem. He kept his fingers on the cash and I thought he was going to keep hold of it and not give it to me. The desperation to get my hands on it was nearly overwhelming. ‘Okay,’ he said, eventually releasing his grip on the notes, ‘but if you miss a payment, you pay double next week.’

And then I lost.

He’d left by then and I remember being angry about that.

Because I would have borrowed more.

They’ve not approached me yet, but I know it’s inevitable because that’s how it works. In the gambling world, there are many others like me and I’ve heard the stories about what happens to those who don’t pay. They intimidate and threaten at first to give you the chance to come up with the cash. It doesn’t matter how you get it; they don’t care: beg, borrow or steal, as long as you pay. Most people pay, somehow. One guy ripped off the company he worked for. He was their accountant and simply transferred a hundred thousand pounds from their account into his own. He didn’t even try to hide what he’d done because he knew he’d get caught and he knew he’d go to prison.

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