Mending The Shroud by JM Bray

Author:JM Bray
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Harlequin Enterprises, Australia Pty Ltd

Sari Smelled Tea

Sitting at dinner with Coleman and Jolie had been wonderful and unbearable. While Sari enjoyed being with them, seeing the love they shared brought a longing for the same inner completeness. It wasn’t jealousy she struggled with — it delighted her to see Jolie so happy. What gnawed at her was the realization that she had never experienced the bond that already joined them. It carved out a hollow place in the pit of her being and sat like a piece of bad fruit. The knowledge tormented her throughout the day. She would never know true happiness, never experience that joy. Everyone would leave her, either by choice or circumstance. They always had. Sari tried to push it down, but it grabbed her by the scruff of the neck and shook her throughout the day.

She mentally slapped herself. Share their joy. It’s not as if they are excluding you. Besides, Jolie will need your support if Coleman has to Travel again. No matter how she tried to quell the feelings, the thing inside her kept building, like a canyon flood after a heavy rain. Loss, fear, despair, coming for her in the darkness.

She’d hugged Jolie and bid them goodnight then headed to her room. Along the way, she glanced over her shoulder repeatedly, sure that the feelings would somehow manifest themselves and rush down the hall in a wall of roiling, muddy sludge to sweep her away. She ran the last few steps to her room, slamming the door, her ears ringing with the roar of rushing water. She leaned against the door, bent over, grasping her head to keep it from falling off. The moment passed, and she staggered to her chair and collapsed into it, staring out the window into the darkness.

She was six again, looking down at the Matriarch’s face as she reached up toward the thick branch where Da had tied her with his big leather belt. The water had come rushing out of the night, swirling about them, pulling at the tree where they took refuge. During the dark, wet, madness that followed, first Ma, then Da lost the strength to hold on and left her, slipping away into the darkness. When the waters receded and daylight came, she hung there like a rag doll, unable to undo the belt.

‘Come dear, we will take care of everything.’ The Matriarch climbed to her and carefully cut the leather, holding her tightly. She handed her down to waiting arms and they took her away on their big horses.

For months, Sari woke up screaming, tears streaming down her face. A wall of water rushed at her from the darkness. Jolie’s young voice asked, ‘Will she be all right?’ Then arms encircled her, and a soothing voice said, ‘Sari, little one. All is well. It’s only a dream.’ A dream it may have been, but the feelings were real and only the Matriarch’s voice would pull her out of their murky depths.

Years had passed since the waters

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