Departure Stories: Betty Crocker Made Matzoh Balls (and other lies) by Elisa Bernick

Author:Elisa Bernick
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9780253064097
Publisher: Indiana University Press
Published: 2022-06-09T00:00:00+00:00

TERRA INCOGNITA

Our children are the only people on whom we can safely take revenge for what was done to us.

—Gloria Steinem, Revolution from Within: A Book of Self-Esteem

FOR MY MOTHER AND MANY other women disillusioned by their straitjacketed lives during the 1960s and 1970s, reinventing themselves meant rejecting not only their marriages but also responsibility for their children’s mental health.

When my mom made the decision to abandon the sinking ship of her marriage, we kids were tossed overboard without life jackets. Her new narrative meant that everyone—protagonists and minor characters alike—was set adrift without a story line. No instruction manuals, maps, or sea charts. No guidebooks or how-to videos. We were left to flail in her wake, trying to make landfall and survive through our wits, fevered dreams, and perhaps, memories hidden deep in our DNA.

It’s hard to imagine a time when you couldn’t turn to the internet, a bookstore, or a library to help you navigate unfamiliar terrain. Even back in 1969, you could page through Reader’s Digest and find expert help for almost anything on the home front.

Except divorce.

When my parents announced their divorce, there was almost nothing written specifically for kids or parents to help guide them through the tortuous process of becoming a “broken home.” Nowadays there are hundreds, perhaps thousands, of books and articles about divorce for every stage and age, including these:

Dinosaurs Divorce: A Guide for Changing Families

Divorce Happens to the Nicest Kids

Don’t Fall Apart on Saturdays!: The Children’s Divorce-Survival Book

Helping Children Understand Divorce: A Practical Resource Guide for Mom and Dad Break Up

On the Day His Daddy Left

When Your Parents Split Up . . . How to Keep Yourself Together

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