Zombies Ate My Homework (Shingles Book 5) by John G. Hartness & Authors & Dragons

Author:John G. Hartness & Authors & Dragons [Hartness, John G.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Authors and Dragons
Published: 2018-05-01T07:00:00+00:00

Chapter Seven

Todd looked at the door, barricaded with mannequins and at least two dozen pair of linked handcuffs. “I think that’ll hold them,” he said. “Now we just need to call for help.”

The clerk looked up from the counter. “Good idea, but I don’t have any cell signal.”

Tiffany looked at her in surprise. “Don’t you have a landline?”

“Not for a couple months. The boss didn’t pay the bill, so I’ve been running credit cards on my cell phone. Are all the cell phones out?”

Todd nodded. “Yeah. Nobody’s been able to get a signal since before the first zombie showed up.”

The saleswoman nodded, a sage expression on her face. “Makes sense. They’d nuke the communication grid before they started softening up the population. Classic strategy.”

Tarik walked in from an aisle carrying a saddle with a handle of some sort sticking up from the center. “What are you talking about, classic strategy? And what’s a Sybian?” He set the saddle down on the floor and sat on it, gripping the handle and waving his hand around like an overweight cowboy. “They sure put the saddle horn in a stupid place. No wonder nobody’s bought this thing.”

The clerk sputtered for a few seconds before she finally stammered out, “Th-th-that’s not a toy. I mean, it kinda is, but not for kids. Definitely not for kids.”

Tiffany hopped up on the counter by the clerk. “It’s okay, honey. After this morning, we’re not your average middle schoolers anymore.”

“She’s right,” Alexandra said, leaning beside her friend with a grim expression. “We’ve seen some shit.”

A thunderous crash from the other side of one wall made everyone jump. Andy came out of an aisle at a dead sprint, Mikayla hot on his heels. “It wasn’t me, I swear to God!” Andy said as the others all looked at him with suspicion written all over their faces.

“What was it then, Andy?” Todd asked, giving his brother the benefit of the doubt, for the moment.

“We were just back there, looking at some magazines—” he started, but was interrupted by the clerk.

“Hey! You shouldn’t be looking at those. Did you unwrap any?” She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at him.

“Zombie. Apocalypse,” Mikayla said. “I didn’t think he should die before seeing boobs, and they weren’t going to be mine, so that seemed like the best compromise. And by the way, I’m Mikayla. What’s your name? Sorry about that, I think we were all a little distracted by not dying earlier.”

“Elizabeth,” the clerk said, holding out her hand. She shook hands with Mikayla and then nodded to Andy. “And you’re right. We’ll suspend the rules about kids and porno mags for the duration of the apocalypse, but as soon as the zombies are gone, you better forget anything you saw in those magazines.”

Andy shook his head, his eyes wide. “Some things you can’t ever un-see,” he said in a voice filled with wonder.

“Maybe I shouldn’t have started him off with Mega-Jugg Farmgirls and the Pets They Love,” Mikayla said with a shrug.

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