Why Can't Freshman Summer Be Like Pizza? by Andy V. Roamer

Author:Andy V. Roamer [Roamer, Andy V.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2021-10-26T19:48:52+00:00

Chapter Ten

This Country Is Not for Me

Well, both Mom and Dad passed the background check and the fingerprinting part of the citizenship process. Dad complained that it felt humiliating, being fingerprinted and photographed, treated like a common criminal, with the fingerprints sent to the FBI. Mom took it differently, saying they had to do that to try to keep real criminals out of the country.

She did agree it could get really unpleasant for some people. There was a man there before them who started screaming and yelling because the FBI said there was something wrong with his fingerprints and he had to come and do everything all over again. What could be wrong with someone’s fingerprints? I don’t blame the guy for being upset. He had already waited for months to get his results and now the process would be delayed again. Mom said he was so upset he made Mom and Dad wait too.

Luckily, Mom and Dad’s fingerprints were okay. They’ve received the letter saying they have been scheduled for the next step: the interview with the immigration officer. This will take place later in August. That’s the biggie. That’s where the officer interviews you, makes sure you can write and understand English, and can ask you any ten of up to a hundred questions about the US government and history.

Dad’s nervous about this part. His English isn’t great, and Mom and I are always helping him with his spelling on any forms he has to fill out. And the test depends on the interviewer. Dad showed me the test-prep booklet. Some of the questions are pretty easy, like “What’s the capital of the United States?” and “How many senators are there?” But some of those questions on the test are much harder, questions I would probably get wrong. Like “How many amendments are there to the US Constitution?” and “Name one of the writers of the Federalist Papers?” Huh?

Dad claims the test is rigged. I’m not sure about that. But I guess it depends on how hard the examiner wants to make it. And with Dad’s charming personality, I can see an examiner making it very hard. Dad better be on his best behavior or else.

After dinner tonight Dad asked me to help him prepare for the test. Yay! He’s finally stopped procrastinating. When I walked into his little study he was flipping through the test-prep booklet. But he didn’t look like he was studying. Instead he was turning the pages haphazardly and frowning. No, scowling is more like it. That’s more powerful than frowning, right? Kind of like frowning to the umpteenth power.

When he saw me he put the book down and started complaining again. About a lot of things. He told me that the immigration process was all a money-making racket. That it showed the country didn’t really want immigrants. That trying to become a citizen the honest way was foolish because there were easier, dishonest ways to do it. That he’d never learn all the questions no matter how hard he tried.

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