The Reluctant Vampire (The Reluctant Vampire, Book 1) by Eric Morecambe

Author:Eric Morecambe [Eric Morecambe]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: HarperCollins Publishers
Published: 2013-05-27T00:00:00+00:00

King Victor was in his room in his top hat, string vest and black underpants with the bat motif all over them in white, waiting for his suit to dry. He angrily paced about his room waiting for news of the two escapees.

* * *

In the village itself, Doctor Plump bumped into Grabbo and Areta.

‘Have you heard the news?’ he asked.

‘Yes,’ said Grabbo and his daughter nodded her lovely head.

‘Have you any idea where they might be?’ the Doctor asked.

‘Not really,’ Grabbo said. ‘One of the villagers thought he saw what could have been them making towards the woods, but nobody’s sure.’

‘If anybody knows where find them, I would think that Wilf the Werewolf would,’ Areta said nervously.

‘Well, let’s see if we can find Wilf. Maybe he will tell us,’ the Doctor said with more than a glint of greed in his eyes.

‘At this time of night Wilf will be in the forest,’ Grabbo spoke quietly.

‘To the forest then,’ Plump said, rubbing his hands together.

‘What will you do if you find them there?’ Areta spoke firmly.

‘Er well … what would you do?’ the Doctor asked, not wanting to commit himself either way.

‘The same as you,’ Areta said cleverly. She looked at the Doctor.

The Doctor looked shiftily away from her hard gaze, thinking to himself that if he captured Valentine and Igon he would be in the good books of the King for ever.

‘What would you do, Doctor?’ she asked again.

‘I’m afraid I … er, I’d …’

‘Yes, Doctor?’

‘Help them,’ he lied.

‘So would the whole village,’ Grabbo said. ‘Nobody wants them hurt. Maybe this is the chance we’ve all been waiting for, to get rid of the Vampires and elect a president.’

‘A president?’ the Doctor gulped.

‘Yes. The whole of our country is fed up with having a Vampire ruling over us and this may be just the right moment to change all that, wouldn’t you think, Doctor?’

‘Why yes, of course. Oh yes. A president would be a wonderful idea,’ the Doctor lied once more. His thoughts were of a different nature. He was thinking only of himself. He thought that if he captured the two villains now, he would be well in with Victor if the Vampires win. If they lose, I’ll be in with the president. Either way I’m in.

‘Let’s find Wilf,’ the Doctor smiled. Actually smiled.

The three of them made off in the direction of the forest. They passed many people pretending to look for Valentine and Igon, but using the excuse to have quick meetings with one another and organise themselves to be ready to strike if called.

They lit up three large torches and made their way into the woods. They went the long way round so as to avoid other people and soon found themselves alone and well on their way, the Doctor thinking of maybe a Vampirehood; Grabbo thinking of who could be president, while Areta thought that the weather that night was doing her hair no good.

* * *

King Victor put his suit on although it was still damp.

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