The Before and After (The Heart Break Series Book 1) by Emma Evans

Author:Emma Evans [Evans, Emma]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2021-04-02T04:00:00+00:00

Chapter 21- The Before

I lie awake in bed for most of the night. I feel exhausted by the time the sun rises and I contemplate not going to my lectures today. My head is so confused about Brennan. I know he didn’t mean to hurt me yet he seemed to show no remorse whatsoever either. He pushed me away from him after he told me to stay away. I hadn’t realized the threat held any weight. I feel like I cannot reach him but there’s a part of me that now wonders whether I should. I have never felt scared of him before but his cold eyes and cutting words had thrown me. Brennan closed himself off yesterday and the more he drank, the more he seemed to be imitating Nathan. Would Nathan have lashed out like Brennan had?

My head hurts and my eyes are burning. I am yet to inspect my side. I only feel the residual pain when I touch the area that came into contact the with the table. I’ve had worse falls than this but I don’t know whether that is any comfort or not. I fear looking at the damage because even though I rationalize Brennan really hadn’t meant to lash out, it doesn’t change the fact he did. I guess it’s not even the lashing out that hurts the most; it’s the fact he didn’t really seem to care he had inflicted the pain.

I rub my chest absentmindedly. I don’t want to move from my bed today although I know I should. I have too much work to do and I need the distraction. I pick up my phone from my bedside cabinet. I had put it on silent last night after I came home. It’s a little after seven o’clock in the morning and I don’t have any messages or calls from Brennan. I hadn’t realized I had been expecting one until I feel the crushing disappointment. I guess I assumed that at some point he would realize what he had done and send me a message to apologize. I stare at my phone as if it is playing tricks on me; it’s not.

I debate whether I should scroll through some social media to divert my attention but as I contemplate this, it comes back to me where I saw the girl with Brennan yesterday before; Krista. She’d been in those few photos with Brennan on a night out; when he had been growing distant. After everything that had gone on, I hadn’t even contemplated whether it was Brennan in the photos or whether it had been Nathan. I open Instagram and I click onto Brennan’s profile. I scroll through the photos until I find the ones I want. The photos of that time are still on his account. If it had been Nathan, wouldn’t Brennan have deleted the photos? Brennan has posted since these particular photos so it’s not like he wouldn’t have seen them. I type in Nathan’s name into the search bar and after scrolling through a few Nathan’s, I realize he doesn’t have an account.

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