Perfect Rivalry by Radclyffe
Author:Radclyffe [Radclyffe]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 9781636792170
Publisher: Bold Strokes Books
Published: 2022-05-01T20:41:10+00:00
Chapter Twelve
Ren lay awake listening to Dani breathe. The sound was foreign and fascinating. Sheâd never slept with anyone else before. Thinking back, the last time sheâd had a roommate was in her first year of college, and her roommate, Sarah Fenway, had hardly ever been there. Sarahâd had a group of her own friends whom sheâd known from high school. Even then, Ren had recognized that what passed as worldliness and sophistication among Sarah and her friends was really an elaborate disguise to cover insecurity and uncertainty, but that hadnât made their dismissal of her any easier. Ren, feeling out of place whenever any of them decided to spend time in their suite, had taken very quickly to studying in the library. Sheâd once heard someone refer to her as the little ghost when they thought she hadnât been listening. She supposed she was in a way, moving in and out of circle after circle, never leaving an impression on anyone except the teachers and mentors. Sheâd impressed them for her aptitude, but even they had never seen beyond that to consider what her achievements might have cost. Sax was the only one in her life, until Quinn Maguire, whoâd ever looked at her and not thought of her as special first.
Ren laughed to herself.
Sax had never found her extraordinary, and in fact had told her point-blank sheâd have to be tough and resilient and enterprising to succeed in a career in surgery.
âAnd you think Iâm not,â Ren had said, supremely confident at the age of fifteen.
âI think you donât know enough to know what you can do,â Sax had said. âOr what you might not want to do.â
âIâm not afraid of the competition,â Ren said. âIâve heard what youâve said before, about there always being room at the top.â
Sax sighed. âThatâs an expression thatâs supposed to be encouraging. But it doesnât mention the cost of success.â
âLike what?â
âLike giving up big chunks of your life at a time when you should be enjoying it mostâlike putting aside relationships until later, if later ever comes.â
âYou have a relationship with Jude,â Ren pointed out stubbornly.
âYes, and Iâm damn lucky I do. If Jude wasnât the amazing person she isââ Sax ran a hand through her hair, and a distant look came into her eyes. âIâm not sure who I might have turned into in another ten years.â
âIâm not worried about what might happen in twenty years,â Ren said.
âI know. But the sacrifices will start a long time before thatâjust try to notice, okay?â
âI know what I want,â Ren had told her. âAnd I know what it will take. Youâve told me. Iâve been listening.â
Sax had studied her for long seconds, then nodded in agreement. âAll right then. Letâs talk about where you ought to train.â
And from that point on, Sax had believed in her. Sheâd never again warned her of the consequences of her decisions. And Ren had not forgotten.
âWhat are you thinking about?â Dani said from the darkness.
âMy sister,â Ren said.
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