If I Fall by Britt Morgan

Author:Britt Morgan [Morgan, Britt]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Independent
Published: 2022-01-06T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 20

The next morning, we woke early to go see Ava in the hospital. Jay waited outside the door while I went in. It made my heart hurt to see her lying there, pale and sick looking, an IV in her arm. She saw me come in and smiled, her dark chocolate eyes flashing with happiness.

“Es maldita hora!” she said. “Where have you been?” Her voice sounded raw and scratchy. I set the bouquet of flowers that Jay had bought for her on the stand near the bed before sitting down and taking her hand. She squeezed it weakly. I couldn’t help but notice that there was already a bouquet before ours—that one was from Ty.

“How are you feeling?” I asked. She laughed, but it was not with amusement.

“Like defunción warmed over.”

“I can imagine.” In my mind, I saw her again, lying cold and limp on the bathroom floor, on the brink of death—no heartbeat, no breath.

“I heard you’re the one that found me,” Ava said. “Ty told me.” She caught my eye, her face suddenly serious, and I found myself looking away.

“Yeah,” I said. “When you didn’t answer your phone, I got worried. And when I found you—you were almost dead.” Ava’s gaze didn’t even waver as she stared at me.

“A little demasiado at once, I think,” she joked, but this time I couldn’t find anything amusing about the situation. She’d almost died, and I’d had to save her life. What if I hadn’t found her in time? I’d have two dead friends. As if the first one hadn’t almost sent me over the edge. I wasn’t cut out for this—for God sakes, I could barely take care of myself, let alone take care of Ava.

“We’re you trying to kill yourself?” I asked. Ava looked caught off guard, her face scrunching up in a look of distaste.

“Of course not.”

“Do you realize that if I hadn’t walked in, you’d be dead right now?” An image of Ava laying cold and stiff in a coffin in the rain made me sick to my stomach, and I had to look away. I envisioned her being buried next to Carter; my two best friends. My two best dead friends. Their headstones would be pretty, but the birth dates and death dates would be too close together. People would stop and stare with pity. They were only kids, they’d say. What a tragically short life. And then eventually, after some time, my own headstone would join them. I would be nothing here on earth. Just a memory. Just a distant memory. My name forgotten—I would be forgotten. After Carter’s passing, I was certain there was nothing else in the world I could lose that I cared about. I was wrong. If I lost Ava, that would have been everything.

“You’re being a little dramatic, aren’t you?” said Ava. “I’m fine, Khloe. It was an accident.” I got to my feet so I wouldn’t let my hand slip and slap her for being so Goddamn stupid.

“A little dramatic,” I agreed.

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