Grumpy Old Love Gods (Grumpy Old Gods Book 4) by unknow

Author:unknow
Language: eng
Format: azw3
Publisher: Stormdance Publications
Published: 2021-02-13T00:00:00+00:00

Herne Goes a Hunting

By Nic Steven

“A dating agency!” The man scraped the ground with his feet, snorted and thrust his head forward so his antlers were in battle position. Hair began to sprout from his skin, his shoes transformed into hooves and his arms lengthened and became hooved as his back bent enough for them to reach the ground.

“Easy, big fellow,” said the blonde woman. Her green cat-like eyes surveyed him. “Give me a chance to explain.” She reached forward and stroked the stag’s neck as if he were a pet dog.

He stopped snorting and the fur and hooves receded. Clothes reappeared and soon the only evidence of his transformation were a fine pair of fourteen-point antlers. He seated himself on a comfortable-looking stump that formed part of the woodland bower they sat in. “A dating agency,” he repeated. “The Lord of the Hunt reduced to this.”

“Indeed, Herne.” She stroked his arm, as she had been stroking his neck. “Think about it. You say you seek romance. You think your charms have faded so much that no immortals will consider you.” At this, she gently shook her head. “You say you need help.” She gazed at his well-muscled chest, his powerful thighs, and quickly looked away from that area. “You have no experience of mortal romance. Nor have I, at least not in this age.” She sighed. “There is someone with much experience of what you need. Ah, but mortals, dear Herne. They live such brief lives.”

“True, Tania, but it is said that they burn the brighter for that.”

Tania shook her golden-curled head. “Are you familiar with The Godweb?”

Herne nodded. “Just a little.”

“As long as you know the right glyph, you will manage. Focus your mind on the Godweb glyph and, when your scrying bowl shows an array of smaller glyphs, concentrate on this one.” An image appeared in the air: a plump, dark-haired, middle-aged woman inside a question mark made up of mist. Underneath, in a Fae script. Auntie Agatha answers your problems. “You have that?”

Herne nodded and Tania left the bower, took a last look at the antlered man and gave a slow shake of her head.

The next day, he pulled a wooden bowl from a hole in a trunk making up part of his bower. He filled it with water, then gazed into it, focussing his mind on The Godweb glyph, a figure of Artemis with her bow. Godweb’s always a bit heavy on the Greek stuff, he thought, but The Huntress does fit well for a search. He focussed on the image and thought about finding love. An array of glyphs appeared. An image of a wand with love spells lettered underneath glowed next to a similar one for potions. Lots of crystal charmers and seers offering to line you up with a perfect partner had their adverts. He shied away from all these. He wouldn’t want anyone in the community of deities to know about his problems. At one time, he could have had the pick of the minor goddesses, along with a host of dryads and naiads.

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