Dangerous Interfaces by Robert Silverberg
Author:Robert Silverberg [Silverberg, Robert]
Language: eng
Format: epub
ISBN: 0671720171
Publisher: Baen Books
Published: 1990-09-30T21:00:00+00:00
24
Joan blinked, once, twice. Her brain fired erraticallyâsights roared; sounds, as in hammering battle, flashed. Orange letters went off: DANGER. APPROACHING FATAL SYSTEMS ERROR. She reeled back. Space itself shrank, expanded, warped its contents into bizarre shapes before lurching at last into concrete objects.
The street corner looked familiar. Still, the white plastiform tables, matching chairs, and mechwaits bearing trays to lounging customersâall that had disappeared. The elegant awning still hung over the sidewalk, imprinted with the name the innâs mechwait, Garçon ADM-213, had taught her how to read. But the letters that spelled the innâs nameâAUX DEUX MAGOTSâhad been obliterated.
Voltaire was banging on the door when Joan materialized beside him. âYouâre late,â he said. âI have accomplished marvels in the time that it took you to get here.â He interrupted his assault on the inn door to cup her chin and peer into her upturned face. âAre you all right?â
âIâI think so.â Joan straightened her suit of mail. âYou nearlyâ¦lost me.â
âI can only offer genius, not perfection.â
âThese marvels you speak ofâ¦you apprehended Torquemada?â
âTorquemada is dead.â
Joanâs brain rang like an anvil struck by a hammer. âHeâs beenâ¦deleted?â
âSlain by Hoover himself in an attempt to protect Hooverâs much endangered reputation.â Voltaire retied the satin ribbon at his throat with sharp, decisive moves that punctuated his delivery.
âOneâs reputation is like oneâs chastity.â Was chaste St. Catherine right? Had Voltaire ruined hers? âOnce gone, it cannot be restored.â
âThank heaven for that! You have no idea how tedious it is to make love to a virgin.â He added hastily, in response to her reproachful look, âI know of only one exception to that rule,â and gave her a courteous bow. âTo remain chaste throughout life is unnatural. Starving oneâs nature to nourish oneâs reputation distorts both. You can drive Nature out with a pitchfork, but she always returns. And in the oddest places. Public restroomsâ¦â Voltaire looked through a window, but could see nothing. The blinds were drawn.
âThe inn,â Joan said. âIt appears closed.â
âNonsense. Paris cafes never close.â He resumed rapping on the door.
âBy public restroom, do you mean an inn?â
Voltaire stopped knocking and looked at her with disdain. âPublic restrooms are facilities in which people relieve themselves.â
Joan blushed, envisioning a row of holes dug in the ground. âBut why call it a restroom?â
âAs long as man is ashamed of his natural functions, he will call it anything but what it is. Such shame enabled me to expose Hooverâs darkest secrets. Like all complex beings, he is a system of not one but multiple intelligences. Subprograms others cannot see run simultaneously beneath the surface program. Like your voices.â
Joan bristled. âMy voices are divine! Voices of archangels and saints!â
âYou appear to have occasional access to your subprograms. But manyâHoover, Torquemadaâdonât. Especially if they are unacceptable.â
âUnacceptable? To whom?â
âTo us. Or rather, to our dominant program, the one we most identify with and present for show to the world. I accessed one of Hooverâs lustful subprograms, suppressed throughout his life, andââ here Voltaire rubbed his hands together like a villain in one of his dreadful plays ââbroadcast it planetwide.
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