Age Well Now by Gottlieb S.;Rosenberg-Gottlieb F.;

Author:Gottlieb, S.;Rosenberg-Gottlieb, F.;
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: G&D Media
Published: 2021-08-15T00:00:00+00:00

Silence Is a Part of Speech

Just as skipping or delaying an occasional meal can help clean up our act in the culinary department, silence is a great tool for rectifying the power of speech. In the past we have experimented with various ways of exercising some verbal restraint—for example, steering clear of any semblance of gossip, even for a short time. Challenging, but it can grow on you. We’ve tried to avoid complaining between the hours of 6 and 7 p.m. We’ve instituted weekly roundtable gratitude sessions at family dinners, each person taking a turn to voice appreciation for something that happened during the week. A friend of ours with a less than golden tongue decided he was going to put a dollar in a charity box every time he cursed. Such ruses won’t make us perfect, but they’ll help us understand and internalize the principle of carefully choosing our words. We have grown to respect the strength, the compassion, and even the efficiency that accrue from guarding one’s tongue.

Is your next statement going to spread love and encouragement, or might it be better to choose silence instead? When you open your mouth to speak, will you be releasing positive or negative vibrations into the universe or into your living room? In short, are you a beacon of light or an SOB?

Words are an investment, so spend wisely. Offer your significant other one compliment, one “I love you,” and one sincere “thank you” every day. Yes, we understand: some of us are not all that demonstrative by nature. Do it anyway. It’s good to acknowledge the kind things your partner does, even though it might seem OK to take these deeds for granted after all these years. Especially for those of us who are in second marriages, such verbal appreciation can be a salve to heal old wounds.

LYING IN WAIT

A mentor of ours told us a story about how, as a teenager, he was a pathological liar, and how he changed. In a notebook small enough that he could carry it around in his shirt pocket, he made a mark for every lie he told in the course of a day. The sum total was fifty lies. He resolved to tell one less lie every day. So the next day, after ticking off forty-nine lies, he was able to restrain himself until the next day, when he told forty-eight lies. The next day he told forty-seven, and so on. Each day it got a little easier to hold himself back. By the time he cut down to about ten lies a day, he had grown so accustomed to telling the truth that he had to force himself to make up a few lies at the end of the day just to fulfill the quota. By the fiftieth day he had become an honest young man.

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