The Happiest Apocalypse: An Erotic LitRPG Novel (Miracle World Book 1) by Dragon Cobolt

Author:Dragon Cobolt [Cobolt, Dragon]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: Uruk Press
Published: 2022-12-11T16:00:00+00:00

Level 2

Chapter Five: The Horde

Marc opened his eyes to the sounds of alarms, a glowing set of numbers, and a mass of black hair. Only once Tiff rolled out of bed and scrambled into her clothes with shocking speed did Marc realize they’d been spooning. Which meant that last night hadn’t been a dream...

“Get dressed, Wolfe!” Tiff snapped, jerking her jeans up and buttoning them shut. “That’s the general fucking alert.”

Marc blinked. The numbers floating before his eyes were clear, but they also made no sense. How the fuck had he earned 245 XP? What for?

“Wolfe!” Tiff shouted.

“Fuck!” Marc scrambled out of bed. It took a few seconds of flailing and wriggling to remember to let his arms and his legs just move without thinking about it too hard. Once he wasn’t thinking, his clothes appeared on him as if by magic, his arms and his legs slotting into the holes with ease. He buttoned his pants shut as Tiff checked her pistol, slid it into her holster, then jerked her head.

The two of them jogged out of the barracks to find the whole of Outpost 31 was roiling like it’d been kicked by some vengeful deity. Except that now that Marc thought about it, that metaphor could be very literal these days. The sound of gunfire was coming from the walls and more and more soldiers were grabbing rifles and rushing to join them.

Tiff jogged over to where rifles were being passed out by the quartermaster. The burly, redheaded woman passed her one with a quick nod. She turned to do the same to Marc but Tiff held up a hand to stop her. “No offense, Marc, but guns aren't really your thing. What can you use?”

Marc closed his eyes. “Staves, clubs, daggers, darts, slings,” he said, quickly. He felt a momentary tug, like he was forgetting something. But Tiff and he were in a fucking hurry. He was also still at least thirty, maybe forty percent asleep.

“Who the fuck are you, King David?” the quartermaster asked.

Marc laughed, knuckling sleep grit out of his eyes. “Sorry, them's the breaks.”

“Can you find any of those?” Tiff asked, her voice flat.

“Fuck!” The quartermaster gritted her teeth. “Maybe. We turned this old 24 Hour Fitness into the storage building. We used some of the weight bars to make shelves.”

“Got it!” Marc made fingerguns at her, then turned and sprinted towards the storage building. He got two steps away before he remembered that the storage building was where the quartermaster was standing and turned around to find that the quartermaster was already inside the building. He stood at the door, his face beat red while Tiff ran to the wall.

When the quartermaster emerged, she was carrying a belt with a knife stuck into a scabbard in one hand and a metal pole in the other. She chucked both to Marc.

“One quarterstaff, I guess,” she said. “Plus I found a spare hunting knife. Now go make yourself useful.”

“Aye aye, captain!” Marc said.

“I’m a fucking sergeant, asshole, I work for a living!”

But Marc was already headed for the wall.

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