Probed: MM Alien Tentacle Romance by T. M. Chris

Author:T. M. Chris [Chris, T. M.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2023-06-19T16:00:00+00:00

Chapter 8

From that point on, Rick took his own showers and brushed his own teeth. He wasn’t a child or an animal, which was how the Kathwacki thought of humans, he realized, like they were creatures of lower intelligence, forgiven for their mistakes because they didn’t have the capacity to do better. Stupid aliens thought they were so great, with their rehabilitative justice system and highfalutin names like Good Person and Global Beauty and Most Supreme Specimen.

While they’d been cuddling after their shower scene, Rick had asked the ambassador for a name to call him by. Given that they’d just had sex of a sort, he couldn’t keep referring to him as “Ambassador.”

“But you know my name,” the ambassador had said in confusion. “You called me by it the day we met.”

“I called you Ambassador Gwalizche. I was hoping for something less formal.”

“As I told you before, there’s no need to use my title. Most Supreme Specimen is fine.”

The two of them went back and forth in an imitation of the old Abbott & Costello “Who’s on First?” routine until Rick finally understood that Gwalizche translated into English as Most Supreme Specimen.

“You mean when I say Gwalizche, it’s the same as if I said Most Supreme Specimen?” He was retroactively embarrassed by the number of times he’d said Gwalizche without realizing he was sucking up to his alien overload by using a ridiculously flattering phrase.

“That’s manipulative,” he pouted. “Making people brown-nose you just to speak to you.”

After a diversion into the subject of what brown-nose meant, the ambassador said, “But many of your English names also have positive meanings, like Grace or Justice. It’s natural for a parent to choose a name with a positive meaning.”

“I suppose.” It didn’t seem the same somehow.

“What does Re-uk mean? It doesn’t translate as anything.”

“Because it doesn’t mean anything. It’s short for Richard, but that doesn’t mean anything either.”

He decided not to mention that another nickname for Richard was Dick, which definitely did mean something, suddenly understanding what the ambassador meant about choosing names with positive meanings.

“Anyway, it’s not Re-uk. It’s Rick.”

But the ambassador couldn’t make his skin rumble out Rick, and Rick refused to call the ambassador Most Supreme Specimen so they eventually settled on Re-uk and Gwal, which Rick suggested as a nickname.

The ambassador agreed to Gwal, but when he said it back, Rick realized it meant “supreme” in Kathwacki, so he was still kissing the alien’s ass, just not as badly. Stupid Kathwacki language. And stupid Transitron that gave him the ability to understand it.

It was all propaganda, including the book Gwal had brought home for him, which he now realized wasn’t intended for young Kathwacki at all but rather for young humans in order to brainwash them into accepting an alien presence on their planet.

Yes, the Kathwacki’s home planet had been on the verge of destruction because their local sun had gone supernova, but did that mean they had to come to Earth? And maybe there weren’t a lot of inhabitable planets, but this one happened to be taken, regardless of whether or not it was closest.

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