In Heat: Six Erotic Stories by Jacinda Boudèt
Author:Jacinda Boudèt [Boudèt, Jacinda]
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Published: 2023-11-24T00:00:00+00:00
5 â Rushing Back
Iâm in the restaurant with Mona when the topic of Richard comes up.
âCâmon, Rachel, admit it,â she says to me, âyouâre still thinking of him.â
I sigh, look off. Itâs like she can read my mind. I guess in that case, I better not lie.
âYeah,â I say, blowing out my bangs as I look back at her, grab my glass of wine for another sip.
âAnd howâs that going for you?â
I roll my eyes. âItâs not.â
âItâs been months, honey â you should be over him by now.â
âI know.â
Now itâs Monaâs turn to sigh. âYou never called him, right? Never showed up to your old hangouts, looking for him, driving by his houseâ¦none of that shit, right?â
I shake my head. âNone of that. I was cool, calm, collected. It was hard, butâ¦â
âBut you got through it,â she says with a nod as she too reaches for her wine glass. âAnd thatâs all you can hope for with a breakup like that.â
We sip our wine, letting the silence fill the space between us. The restaurant is busy on this Wednesday night. That was the night Richard and I usually had our date night each week. Sometimes we went to Tonyâs, other times a place he liked. Either way, we always ended up back at his place to fuck.
God, I miss that.
I havenât had sex since Richard. I want toâ¦desperately so. But each time I think about doing it, I can only think of him.
Clearly Iâm not over him yet. Sometimes I wonder if I ever will be.
Mona puts down her glass and looks at me with a smile. âAnd then there comes that choice,â she says, looking off whimsically as if seeing past relationships, future ones, or God knows what.
âOh?â I say, cocking my head to one side. âAnd what choice is that?â
âYou know⦠the choice.â
When my eyes narrow she continues.
âWhen itâs been long enough, youâve been apart and youâve gotten over him but you still cherish that time together.â
âLike I feel now,â I say, blowing my bangs out again.
âExactly. Wellâ¦you get there and you realize what you had was special, but also that you can live on your own, you donât need anyone.â
âSoâ¦the choice?â
She smiles. âYou can live without himâ¦but do you want to?â
What she says hits me hard, both for the truthfulness of it and how exactly it hits at my situation with Richard.
I can live without him, that much is clear. Hell, Iâve been doing it for over three months now.
Butâ¦do I want to?
Mona and I have a few more glasses of wine before we leave the restaurant, call it a night. But all through my night at home, in the back of my mind, I keep thinking aboutâ¦him.
Should I call?
Would he be down to give it another go?
Am I just being stupid and crazy and out of my mind?
In the end I figure itâs the wine talking and I go to bed.
But when I awake in the morning, those same thoughts remain. In fact, theyâre more powerful now than when I went to sleep.
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